Book 5: Chapter 8 |
Repeat, Reset, Reset, SCENE 3
1. CLASSROOM
It’s a high school classroom, belonging to first-year Class 6. It’s the 1,533rd cycle of the Rejecting Classroom. School has ended. The sky outside the window is as cloudy as it’s been all 1,533 times. Maria Otonashi is sitting on the teacher’s podium as she speaks with Daiya. Having inferred that Maria is no ordinary transfer student, Daiya is on guard.
DAIYA
…Don’t look at me. It bothers me. It feels like you can see everything about me.
MARIA
You aren’t entirely wrong. I have investigated my classmates to find the owner of the Rejecting Classroom, so I have information a transfer student shouldn’t know on her first day.
The corners of Daiya’s mouth lift upward, and he adopts a mocking attitude.
What a bunch of nonsense. Fine, I’ll bite. What have you found?
MARIA
I know what’s on Kokone Kirino’s back.
Daiya’s face stiffens visibly.
DAIYA
…How do you know about what’s on Kiri’s back? That’s the one thing she would never show to anyone. Even I’ve never seen it before… Don’t tell me you’re one of the people who hurt her?
MARIA
That’s the twenty-second time.
DAIYA
What is?
MARIA
That’s the twenty-second time you asked me that question when I referred to Kokone Kirino’s back.
Daiya scowls. Of course, he doesn’t remember saying that. Only Maria, with her ability to retain her memories from the repetitions in the Rejecting Classroom, experienced them. Maria abruptly reflects on all the time she has spent in solitude, then lets out a weary sigh.
MARIA
I’ll explain how I got my hands on such information. I already
…… [Time passes.]
Maria tells Daiya she has lived this same March 2 over and over, 1,533 times. He listens in silence for a time without interjection.
DAIYA
I get it. You mentioned Kiri’s back to persuade me that all this BS is the truth. But that alone isn’t enough to eliminate the possibility that you just hired a private eye or something to look into Kiri.
MARIA
Well then, how about I mention something known only to you and another person?
DAIYA
…What?
MARIA
One of your childhood friends, Miyuki Karino, told you she had feelings for you, and you rejected her.
Daiya’s eyes widen, but he promptly hides his bewilderment.
DAIYA
That’s definitely something only Rino and I would know. I haven’t told a soul about it, and I know she wouldn’t, either. However you got that knowledge, it can’t have been good.
MARIA
True. I most likely would have never known if I hadn’t heard it from you.
DAIYA
I wouldn’t tell you that. It doesn’t matter if this Rejecting Classroom of yours is for real. I’d never tell that story to another person.
MARIA
I’m sure you wouldn’t under normal circumstances. You told me how Kirino suffered as a result, and you did say you had never intended to tell anyone about that incident.
Daiya would rather leave the subject untouched, and he fixes Maria with a stern glare. Though the intense gaze shakes her internally, Maria does not let it show on her face. She mastered the art of suppressing her emotions back when the number of times she had experienced March 2 was still in the triple digits.
MARIA
However, there was a reason for you to speak of it.
DAIYA
No way. I myself guarantee there could be no reason great enough.
Maria recoils slightly at Daiya’s rebuttal, then pulls herself together and continues.
MARIA
You deliberately told me the part of your past you most wanted to keep hidden because you decided to cooperate with me. This was on the 1,532nd March second.
DAIYA
Are you an idiot? To cooperate with you? If you’re going to lie, at least come up with something good.
MARIA
A Box can grant any possible wish.
DAIYA
…So what?
MARIA
Something in your eyes changed once I told you of Boxes, and you eventually came around to the idea that they are real. Surely you must understand, since this is you we’re talking about here? You have a wish you want granted more than anything else.
DAIYA
……[His brow furrows.]
MARIA
It would appear that rings a bell. You do want a Box. And that’s why you made a request to me. You work with me, and in return, I’ll teach you how to get ahold of a Box.
DAIYA
…[He thinks deeply.] …I’m not the trusting type, so I won’t buy your talk of ‘Boxes’ and ‘Rejecting Classrooms’ so easily. I told you that story about Rino—one you would never find out about under normal means—as a way to convince myself. So that I could convince the me in another world—the me in this loop—that your story about Boxes is true.
MARIA
That’s about the size of it.
DAIYA
…Damn… I hate to admit it, but a trick that favors practicality over emotion sounds a lot like an idea I would have.
Relaxing inside, Maria drops down off the podium. Though she had sat up there to project an air of intimidation, it felt uncomfortable to her. She was raised well and never could do away with her feeling that it was bad manners.
DAIYA
I know my intentions, but how about yours? What’s in it for you, telling me all this?
MARIA
It allows me to make you my partner.
DAIYA
Is that really necessary?
MARIA
It’s because I’m in a deadlock. I need a change of perspective.
DAIYA
So you need a partner—but why me?
MARIA
Surely it can’t be so hard to figure out. You’re the smartest person in class; that’s all. In any case, your intelligence alone gave me cause to suspect you as the owner immediately, without any other proof. You do seem completely oblivious to the idea of being an owner, though, which has removed you as a suspect for now.
DAIYA
I’m smart, huh? Well, that may be true, but it’s still a poor reason for why it has to be me. You could probably use my inability to keep my memories and have other partners aside from me. You’re a partner whore.
MARIA
Relax. I can’t say anything about the future, but you’re my first partner. This is the first time I’ve felt like doing this. It’s possible the reason I feel this way is—
Maria hesitates for a moment, then continues.
MARIA
—you and I have something in common.
Daiya Oomine 09/11 FRI 8:01 PM
Now I’m sure. My target is Maria Otonashi.
If Kazu thinks I’m still fixated on Kiri—that I’m going after Kokone Kirino and not Maria Otonashi—then defeating him will be easy.
Although that’s no excuse to rest on my laurels.
“—Urgh!”
I groan in the entrance.
Now that I’ve seen A 60.5-Foot Gulf, the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes is undeniably hurting me.
…I had no idea.
I had no idea Haruaki was so clearly in love with Kiri. I had thought he’d sacrificed himself and come to the same school as us because he couldn’t turn a blind eye to what had happened to her. It didn’t even cross my mind that romantic inclinations were involved.
Yes, it’s true. I made a mess of not only Kiri’s destiny, but Haruaki’s, too. I’ve trapped so many people while I lived on carefree.
“……Stop.”
Stop thinking this way!
If I start blaming myself, the shadows of crime in my care will attack me again. They’re constantly plotting to reverse our master/servant relationship. If I give them an opening, they’re going to take it.
“Ngh!”
A furious wave of nausea assaults me… I have to power through this. I feel like if I give in to the urge to vomit, my soul will come out with everything else.
I have to choke it down.
I have to choke it all down.
“It’s cruel,” Yanagi says, rubbing my back while I suffer. “None of that would have happened if you had only let Usui have Kirino.”
“……Huh?”
“I often come to your class to meet Kazuki, and Kirino and Usui are both very cheerful people. Except they really aren’t. They’re both forcing themselves to act that way for your sake. They can’t survive as they really are, so they have no choice but to pretend to be happy.”
Yanagi displays a gentle smile as she says this while stroking my back.
“They’re both doing it for you.”
I can read between the lines.
They both ended up that way because of you.
She’s right. She’s right, she’s right, she’s right… She’s right.
It feels awful, like bugs crawling inside my skull, and my vision flickers. I can’t let her stand there and smile. I don’t care if she hit the nail on the head; I can’t let her get away with it.
The moment I think that—
—my hands are around her neck.
“
Aaaaaaaaaah!”
I can’t tell what I’m screaming.
My arms, my throat, my body are all beyond my control, as if I’m possessed. I’m acting on autopilot. But I understand. The thing possessing me—is me. The one taking over is myself.
“Agh, ah!”
Hearing the voice that escapes, and seeing Yanagi’s face turning blue, I finally remember how to take back control.
I release her neck in a panic.
Yanagi collapses, coughing.
“Urk, kh—”
I stare at my hands.
No way… How did I end up like this? I’m not okay anymore if I can strangle a girl without hesitation. If I had come to my senses even a moment later, there would have been no coming back.
Then I understand.
I was this close.
I was a hair’s breadth away from making a mistake.
I touch the earrings in my left ear.
Goddammit, this isn’t gonna help, so stop thinking this way. There’s no turning back for me. I don’t have time to lose my head over distractions.
That’s why I have to get back to normal. I have to be logical.
“Yanagi.” I say her name, my voice careful and calm.
She glares at me with teary eyes.
“You thought I didn’t know?”
“……Cough! Cough, cough! …Know…what?”
“That you’re helping Kazu, and that’s why you said what you did just now to make me suffer.”
I get the sense that, for just a moment, Yanagi’s complexion changes.
“…? What’re you talking about? I don’t understand.”
However, she quickly goes blank, acting bewildered and clueless.
It’s intriguing enough to override my anger. This girl really is cunning. If I hadn’t learned her true nature in that killing game, she would’ve had me utterly fooled.
“You came here because Kazu told you to slow me down, right?”
“……”
A barely discernable silence indicates she’s trying to read the situation.
“I don’t know what you mean. I had no choice but to come here because of your Command. Where exactly would I find the freedom to fit into Kazuki’s plans?”
Hmph. Yeah, might as well tell her.
“I’ve been operating under the assumption you would come here all along.”
Naturally, that surprises her.
“Wh-why? Someone else would have an overwhelmingly higher chance of getting information on Kazuki and Otonashi! There are nearly a thousand of them, you know!”
“It’s about Kazu. He had you under observation after you became a Subject, right? Once he knew you were up to something, he heard from you what my Command was. What would he do once he learns he can’t stop my Commands?
“It’s easy to imagine. He’d give me information intentionally to keep my Commands from turning violent. He’d also get the idea that he could send in someone allied with him to deal a blow to me. You’re perfect for the part. You’re crafty and easy to manipulate, since you love yourself more than anything.” I give a derisive snort of laughter, then ask, “So, am I on the mark?”
Yanagi can’t answer.
“Well, whether you want to answer or not, I can get my answer if I Command you to say it. But there’s no need. Your behavior tells me more eloquently than anything else.”
“Ngh…”
“He’s unique and capable, I’ll give him that. But when it comes to strategy, he has no chance in hell against me. Ultimately, I have him in the palm of my hand.”
Sending in Yanagi as a spy was Kazu’s defense, as well as his offense.
He’s missing something, though. Using others has its risks. As the one with Crime, Punishment, and the Shadow of Crime, I know this better than anyone.
That’s why I can keep my footing.
“Yanagi, you have feelings for Kazu, right?”
“…Wh-what does that matter?”
“If you could, you’d make him have eyes for you, right?”
“Well…I mean…”
Yanagi doesn’t seem to catch on to why I’m saying these things.
“I have a plan that could make him do just that.”
“……”
It would appear that’s enough for our sly Yanagi to deduce what I’m getting at.
“Otonashi and Kazu’s bond is steadfast. It’d take something unusual to break their connection, and that won’t change while you’re here acting as Kazu predicted. You yourself must be the most aware of this, right?”
“…What do you want to say?” Yanagi asks this, though I’d bet she already knows.
That’s why I don’t mince words.
“Betray him.”
Her expression doesn’t change.
“My strategy all along has been to sever their bond. That’s how I’m trying to keep Kazu from reaching his goal. You and I share the same interests.”
Yanagi is quiet for a moment, but then she scowls angrily at me.
“What are you talking about? Our ‘interests’ have nothing to do with it. Do you think anyone would ally with you after you killed them in that murder game and then choked them just now? Do you believe after all that I would betray the one I love to help you?”
“…Do you think Kazu wanted to be in this situation?”
“Don’t avoid the question. I know changing the topic and bringing the conversation into your territory is one of your favorite tricks.”
“You don’t, do you? He doesn’t enjoy compromising his principles, obtaining a Box, and having O haunt his every move, right?”
“Please listen when someone’s talking to you.”
“Whose fault is it? Who has he become like this for?”
“……I said—”
“Maria Otonashi.”
Hearing that name, Yanagi unwillingly swallows her retort.
After she reacts, I continue.
“He’s fighting me like this because of Otonashi. He got a Box to oppose me because he’s obsessed with her. I should let you know I never really cared about what would become of Kazu. I have no intention of killing him, and no reason to want to defeat him, either. If anything, him finding happiness is an ideal scenario to me. Don’t you agree? It’s not like I hate him.”
“……”
“If Otonashi were out of the picture, he wouldn’t have any cause to fight against me. He also wouldn’t have to deal with Boxes anymore. That’s right—his current actions won’t lead him to happiness. The success or failure of his strategies against me have no bearing on his ultimate happiness. So, what can we do to make the circumstances desirable for him?”
I tell her, emphatically:
“Otonashi needs to get away from Kazu. If that happens, he will be able to lead his own life.”
“……”
“Then Kazu can find peace of mind.”
“…But that’s not what he wants.”
Yanagi has taken the bait my questions provided.
I’m internally ecstatic, but naturally, I make sure that doesn’t show.
“There’s no way to guarantee that what Kazu wants is what’s good for him. Otonashi doesn’t want him to do this, either, right? But he’s taking those actions because he thinks it’s all for her sake… Yeah, I see now. When you think about it, you’re aiding and abetting his efforts for Otonashi’s sake.”
I choose to put things that way once I understand that Yanagi doesn’t care for Otonashi.
“What course of action do you think would be preferable for Kazu?”
“That’s…”
“I’ll say it once more. Our interests are aligned… Well, I know you hate me, so I won’t go so far as to say you should collaborate with me. Regardless of what you do, I’m staying my course, though. Kazu isn’t going to accomplish his goal. And to that end—”
I brush the piercings in my right ear, then tell her.
“—I will make it impossible for the two of them to make amends.”
“…N-ngh.”
By all rights, Yanagi would never want to take my side; I can see uncertainty in her eyes.
She’ll probably never emotionally permit herself to cooperate with me. The same goes for violating Kazu’s wishes. Still, if forsaking those feelings will bring Kazu happiness, she will think that’s the best thing to do.
“……Is that…true?”
“Is what true?”
“That you have no intention of harming Kazuki?”
Which is why she asks this question. It’s like she’s grasping for a reason to cooperate with me. Like she’s asking for that one last push.
“I suppose I can say…I won’t harm him. But, well, separating him from Otonashi will undoubtedly be painful for him.”
“I… I see.”
Deep down, she must be more inclined to betray Kazu now.
It looks like Yanagi is going to swallow her feelings and follow my lead. She believes that’s best for Kazu, so she’s going to put herself through the pain of double-crossing him.
It’s a beautiful love indeed.
Well.
Except for the fact that all of what I said to her is a lie.
First off, I did predict she would come here. Everything after that is false.
I hadn’t particularly hypothesized that she would show up. It was when she actually arrived that I hit upon the idea that Kazu had sent her.
When I contemplated why she had come, I couldn’t help but sense something intentional about it. Out of all 998 Subjects, Yanagi was the one to appear; it was just too convenient.
Once that occurred to me, the idea that this was Kazu’s design naturally popped into my head. It wasn’t an especially amazing work of deduction.
Anyway, it would be fair to call my lies just a bunch of bluffs. Saying them aloud, though, prevents Yanagi from making any rash moves, and it makes her consider which side holds more advantages for her.
The claim that Kazu wouldn’t oppose me if only Otonashi were gone is also a lie.
Kazu being who he is, he’s against the very notion of Boxes. My being an owner pits him against me. He’s that type of person.
Another lie is that separating Kazu from Otonashi will make him happy.
I do believe Otonashi is a cancer for him. That’s not something I made up. But it’s not possible to cut out something that has so deeply infected a body. Those two forged an unbreakable link thanks to what amounts to a lifetime together. Rooting out something that has so profoundly pervaded him is as impossible as removing terminal cancer. Attempting to do so would result in some major obstacles. My understanding of this also happens to be the very reason why I gave up on getting him with Kiri.
Let’s say Otonashi parted ways with Kazu. Even then, he’d never get her out of his head. If it goes poorly, Kazu may even become more hung up on her than he is now.
Their bond is, in a certain sense, a curse. There’s no release from a connection of that magnitude.
It’s for this reason that I don’t have anything remotely resembling a plan for shifting Kazu’s attentions to Yanagi.
Every last bit of that is a lie.
All she has to gain by collaborating with me is Kazu’s hate.
Still, it won’t be so easy to see the truth—or falsehood—of my words.
People have a tendency to believe information that is beneficial to them. Yanagi is very much this sort of person. I’m positive she’ll want to place as much faith as she possibly can in any information that suggests she could become his lover and make Kazu happy to boot.
And so she’ll make her choice.
“What should I do?”
Yuri Yanagi will choose to betray him.
“What can I possibly do?”
Her expression is the epitome of humiliation.
Yuri Yanagi is going to kill who she is, endure the pain, and ensnare Kazuki Hoshino, for the sake of one she despises.
All the while unaware that her actions will ruin him.
Ha-ha-ha, tough break. You were duped so easily. I’ll give you some candy or something once this is all over.
Hiding my joy, I tell her, “Otonashi will come here at some point. When that happens, all you need to do is string her along in whatever way is best for you. Use your usual web of lies and theatrics. I’ll provide backup.”
“…How are you going to call Otonashi here?”
“She’ll probably send Otonashi our way before too long.”
“She?”
I say her name—the sole person capable of exercising the same power as me.
“Iroha Shindo.”