Chapter 399 |
Side Story (16)
[“Next is Cha Woon-ssi. You’ll need to listen carefully to this one, because there were a few issues with his results.”]
As he said that, the doctor brought up an image on the monitor. Unlike mine, which we’d seen earlier, it was a stomach photo mottled with angry reds. The doctor stared at it for a moment, then turned to Cha Woon.
[“Do you smoke?”] [“No.”] [“Do you drink alcohol?”] [“Less than average…….”] [“Do you like spicy or strongly seasoned food?”] [“…No.”]
[“Ah, right. I’ve seriously never met anyone who eats as joylessly as he does.”]
Because I tend to neglect meals, everyone probably thinks I’m the one who eats the least at Prism, but that’s not actually true.
[“Don’t embarrass me. Be quiet.”] [“Am I wrong, though?”]
In Prism, the member who dislikes eating the most is Cha Woon.
To begin with, I’m just a picky eater who finds meals bothersome. When I’m hungry and it’s food I like, I eat just fine. On days when I’ve starved all day because of work, I’ve even stood in place during a short break and wolfed down three or four convenience-store burgers in a row. It didn’t even take ten minutes to finish them.
It’s a habit ingrained from working since I was young.
“…What’s wrong with you?” “Hm?” “Did something happen? Are you stressed?” “What are you talking about? I’m just eating.”
I should have taken a picture of Choi Jeokhyeon’s face the first time he saw me eat like that. He probably thought I’d snapped and was shoveling food into my mouth without thinking. With a build as big as mine, it’s ridiculous to think I couldn’t finish that much.
‘I didn’t eat like this when I was using Han Seungbeom’s body … but then again, with a build like this, it’s only natural I’d need a lot of calories just to function.’
I know it’s better to eat slowly, but that’s none of my concern. I’m busy.
As long as my stomach’s reasonably full, everything’s fine.
On the other hand, Cha Woon, despite his big frame, eats like a rabbit. It’s not that he insists on being vegetarian; he’s just extremely sensitive to the smell of meat.
‘Grass, grass, grass … nothing but damn grass.’
His body, like Han Seungbeom’s, loses weight easily with even a little stress, and yet on top of that he mostly eats leafy things or soft dairy products. No wonder he keeps getting thinner. It’d be one thing if he ate all vegetables well, but he hates seasoned greens too. He says he doesn’t like the smell of soy sauce, garlic, or sesame oil.
‘And it takes him all day just to eat.’
Whenever you go to Cha Woon’s studio, there’s always a half-eaten salad abandoned in the corner of his desk. Even when the Prism members eat together, he often just pokes at his food and barely touches it. Then the rest of the members quietly finish what he leaves behind.
‘The other members are the type to just eat their food without complaining, even if it doesn’t taste that great.’
Well, I do that sometimes too, but not to Cha Woon’s extent. There’s a reason fans call him ‘Prism’s Princess‘. Though, of course, that was also short for ‘Mouth of Terror‘.1
Anyway, that guy has a weak stomach to begin with, so with him eating so little and staying on an empty stomach so often, of course there would be problems. Honestly, even when we went in for the endoscopy, Cha Woon was the one I worried about the most.
[“If you look at the monitor here, you can see a wound carved deep like a crater. This is a gastric ulcer. It looks like you already had fairly severe chronic gastritis, and the symptoms worsened due to stress, leading to this condition. Even now, the outlook isn’t very good. If we don’t treat it quickly, it can deepen further and lead to perforation, meaning a hole will actually open up in your stomach.”]
But I didn’t expect it to be this bad.
As soon as the doctor continued his explanation, showing photos of other areas that looked even more severe, I rolled my eyes and looked down at Cha Woon. He immediately hunched his shoulders like an animal grabbed by the scruff, nervously gauging my reaction.
[“…Cha Woon.”]
In that split second, whether from fear, stress, or tension, he clamped a hand over his mouth and dry-heaved.
[“Because of an empty stomach…….”]
This bastard.
Even without the endoscopy results, you could tell just by looking at him that his stomach was a mess.
Then, perhaps startled by his own physical reaction, he even began hiccuping, his face growing paler by the second as he looked up at me. He looked like a child showing their parents a report card full of zeros.
‘He wasn’t gaining any weight, so I deliberately moved the checkup date up…….’
[“Do you usually experience a lot of stress?”] [“…I am a bit sensitive.”] [“Are you sleeping well?”]
[“No…….”]
After a few false leads, the doctor finally hit upon the right answer. He nodded as if he’d expected as much, double-checked the medical history form, and mentioned that it was a massive relief there was no family history of stomach cancer. Then he confirmed Cha Woon’s usual symptoms and began entering the prescription.
[“Realistically, it’s unlikely that an ulcer will heal on its own, so medication is necessary. Of course, reducing stress is also essential.”]
To be honest, I was angry first.
Furiously angry.
If his condition had worsened to this extent, Cha Woon must have been dealing with serious discomfort in his daily life, and yet he hadn’t shown it even once. I’d never seen him go to a hospital, either. At most, I’d seen him buy over-the-counter stomach medicine or digestive aids from a pharmacy.
Every time I’d asked him if he was sick, he’d just give me some excuse like, ‘Oh, I just have a bit of indigestion from eating in the cold‘ or ‘It’s just because I didn’t sleep well last night.’ A montage of all those past lies flashed through my head.
[“Hyung, it’s not morning sickness, right?”]
As the atmosphere suddenly turned cold, Nam Yihwon forced an awkward laugh and blurted out nonsense in a hurry. He was probably trying to lighten the mood with a joke, worried I might start scolding Cha Woon.
[“You really…….”]
[“Ouch! Fine, I crossed the line. I admit it.”]
He overdid it and ended up getting smacked on the crown of the head by Jo Inchan.
[“So that’s why your portions kept shrinking and you kept losing weight, hyung.”]
My insides were boiling, but I didn’t want to scold the members over something like this. The truth is, I can set aside my own feelings any day because I love these punks to death.
He wasn’t sick because he wanted to be, and if he started hiding things even more out of fear of being scolded, what then? Cha Woon doesn’t drink or smoke like Nam Yihwon or me. He’s just naturally vulnerable to stress.
I slowly let out a breath, collected my emotions, and then spoke in a gentler tone.
[“For now, let’s focus on taking your meds and managing your health. We’re in a rest period activity-wise anyway.”]
[“…I feel like I’m already trying pretty hard, so I don’t know what more I’m supposed to do…….”]
[“Have you ever fallen asleep in your studio and woken up locked inside a luxury spa? Because I have…….”] [“Huh?”]
[“I kept saying I was busy, but he wouldn’t listen ……. I got detained for days, dragged through the full course of treatments all over the place, and only got released after he confirmed I was healthy…….”]
[“Please don’t say such terrifying things with that wistful expression.”]
[“I’m being serious. Why do you think my checkup results suddenly got way better after joining YT? You’re about to experience the exact same thing.”]
[“Please save me.”]
[“I’m doing this to spare you.”]
Behind us, I heard Nam Yihwon and Yoo Jay whispering, “So who was it that kidnapped him?”, “Who else would it be?”, but I ignored them and roughly ruffled Cha Woon’s hair with my palm.
[“It’s going to be okay, so let’s just focus on making a full recovery.”] [“…Yes. I’m sorry.”] [“What are you sorry for?”]
[<Woon-nyang is sorry for worrying you>]
Despite all my efforts to comfort him, Cha Woon only grew more dejected and hung his head low. Would he have felt better if I’d yelled at him instead? He really was a strange one.
The doctor’s next chosen target was Nam Yihwon.
[“Alright, this gentleman here. I recall your medical check-up form results were quite concerning, is that correct?”]
[“Ha, ha, ha, ha.”] [“You think this is funny?”]
[“You’ll probably have a lot of phlegm for a while. Some coughing, too. If you look, there’s some inflammation in your lungs. It looks pretty different from Seo Yutae’s lungs that I showed earlier, doesn’t it? Except for extremely rare cases, this kind of thing is almost always caused by smoking.”]
[“This is so unfair. How is that heavy smoker totally fine, and I’m the only one like this?”]
[“Be quiet.”]
[“Unfortunately, while lifestyle habits do matter, health is also very strongly influenced by genetics. Some people smoke heavily and live long lives with no issues, while others never drink or smoke and still develop serious illnesses. It’s unfair, but there’s nothing to be done.”]
[“I see…….”]
[“You do smoke less than Seo Yutae, but you have a habit of chain-smoking, don’t you?”] [“…….”] [“You do. And do you drink and smoke at the same time?”] [“…….”]
[“Yes. Those two habits together are especially bad for the lungs. Even if you can’t quit smoking entirely, you should at least fix that.”]
The moment I heard that, I grabbed the back of Nam Yihwon’s neck hard with one hand.
Then I said in a low voice,
[“Fix it.”]
I’m not exactly in a position to lecture others, but once it’s causing real health problems, it’s time for discipline.
Nam Yihwon, who had been doing his best to dodge the doctor’s advice, slowly turned his head, but as soon as he saw my icy expression, he faced forward again without another word.
[“…….”]
Yeah. You’re prettier when you listen well.
After confirming that he answered politely, I gently kneaded … no, massaged his neck.
[“And now, regarding the liver function test. People who drink the amount and frequency that Nam Yihwon-ssi does are generally considered to have alcohol dependence…….”] [“What?”] [“Yes. Alcohol dependence.”]
After lightly ignoring Nam Yihwon’s performative shock, as if the idea were absurd, the doctor continued.
[“With patients like this, we consider the likelihood of liver function abnormalities to be high and recommend liver function testing. It seems Seo Yutae-ssi requested this specific test because he also had concerns about that. Fortunately, though, your results aren’t actually that bad. There’s no fatty liver, and your cardiovascular function is normal. You don’t usually turn red when you drink, do you? And you probably sober up pretty fast, too.”]
[“Oh, how did you know?”] [“You seem to have an excellent alcohol metabolism. As I mentioned earlier, that’s something you’re born with.”] [“Ah, I take after my father, so I can hold my liquor pretty well. Haha!]”
At that stinging remark, delivered with a nonchalant smile, Jo Inchan muttered, “…Hey“, and jabbed Nam Yihwon in the side with his elbow. Nam Yihwon just replied with a slick, “Why? What’s wrong with that?” before grumbling in an exaggerated tone.
[“So why is smoking a reasonable amount critical, but drinking like a dog is fine? This is seriously absurd.”]
[“That’s the thing about health.”]
[“At least you’re self-aware enough to know you drink like a dog.”]
[“Aside from the two of you I mentioned, everyone else is … honestly, absurdly healthy. It’s impressive.”]
Fortunately, the other members’ test results showed no major issues; they were all in excellent health. I’d been a little worried that Lee Chise might have developed diabetes from eating too many sweets, but the doctor said even he’s still in the clear for now.
Of course, issues like Jo Inchan’s knee aren’t something a standard health check can catch, so it wouldn’t be accurate to call them perfectly healthy. Still, when it came to serious illnesses, it seemed safe to relax for the time being.
[“It’s a huge relief that you’re healthy, you gorillas.”]
[“Infinite thanks to Captain Gorilla.”]
[<Ooga-Ooga Prism>]
I think the results looked better because Prism is on a break right now, but honestly, it would have been weirder if they weren’t healthy. After all, how ridiculous would it look if guys who train like maniacs and pump their muscles to the limit were constantly falling ill? They’re the kind who even fix unavoidable disc issues from intense choreography through exercise alone.
— This is the spirit of a viciously driven legendary idol group that’s stayed in peak condition for over a decade. The nightmare-level knife-sharp synchronized-dance live machines, year-end festival male-idol humiliation factory, Idol Star Athletics Championships first-round-exit specialists2‘I’ll have to send the Pantheion kids for checkups soon, too. I don’t know about the others, but Han Seungbeom is so frail that I need to have him looked over thoroughly. And even though Baek Kiryang said he’s fine now that he’s been in the industry longer, he used to complain about heartburn every time we had schedules, so he definitely needs an endoscopy…….’
With that, Prism’s basic health checkups were complete.
Next up was the long-awaited visit to the department of psychiatry.
…That one was the worst.
You can support this translation through Buy Me a Coffee -`♡´-
Translator’s Corner:
- Oh we finally learned why Lee Danbi is called Princess lol
Princess is 공주 (Gong-ju). Mouth of Terror is 공포의 주둥이 (Gong-po-ui Ju-dung-i). ↩︎
- Literal: a group that humiliates every other boy group at year-end festivals and the group that cuts others at the entrance (Entry Block) of the Idol Athletics Championships.
The last one basically means ‘To be so superior (or for a barrier to be so high) that the “others” doesn’t even get a chance to start. They are “cut” before they even get through the door.’ ↩︎
(To no one’s surprise) something is wrong with my laptop and my F1 and S key not working so if you found typo, thats it … (I’m typing this with on screen keyboard)