Book 5: Chapter 1 |
Ordinarily, none of this would have anything to do with me. I’m too normal to grant wishes, not mine or anybody else’s.
The only one who interests this paranormal entity before me now is Kazu. To him (or her, maybe), I’m nothing more than an acquaintance of his. The only reason I received this power is because he (or she) wanted to influence those around Kazu and satisfy his (or her) desire to toy with him.
The Box I’ve been given is like some hand-me-down, but still I cling to it like a beggar digging desperately through garbage in an effort to survive.
Even so, I’m dependent on it.
O directs an inviting smile toward me.
“O, I’m confused about something. I accept that Kazu is extraordinary. I can also understand your interest in observing him. But I fail to see why a being of your stature would go to such lengths to meddle with a single person.”
“Why is that?”
“Because it’s not natural for someone with so much power at their disposal to do such a thing. You’re obsessed with Kazu. You haunt him without even hiding your desires. That alone is enough to drag you down to the realm of the mundane.”
“And what of it? I’m not in this to be worshipped, so that doesn’t bother me. Just appearing before you and having this conversation was bound to make me ordinary in your eyes, after all.”
“If I wanted to remain an otherworldly enigma, then I would demonstrate my power without saying a word. Allowing others to understand my motives and goal is enough to make my presence something more familiar, you see. Each word I speak turns me commonplace,” he (or she) explains before asking me a question in a pleasant tone. “Might you prefer that I be otherworldly? Perhaps you feel as though the supernatural capabilities of your Box will vanish if the one who grants your wish loses some of their luster? If so, then I’m afraid to say I cannot be what you wish me to be.”
“Then what does that make you? If you’re not a god, then what are you?”
He (or she) tells me his (or her) true nature without any noticeable hesitation.
“I am the direction known as O.”
It’s a straightforward sentence, although I have no idea what it means.
“Direction? What’re you talking about?”
“I am merely a part of the whole that is myself. O is one facet of my vast identity.”
The idea that O is a separate part of some bigger entity still doesn’t help me make sense of things.
“…So to put it in terms of the human body, you’d be like a hand or a foot?”
“Not quite. Ah yes…let’s use the example of water within a large pool. All the water in the pool is ‘me.’ Then scoop out some of that water with a cup. The water in that cup is the me that is O. The name O is the cup for maintaining what constitutes me. That is the direction called O.”
“…What do you mean by describing yourself as a ‘direction’?”
“My greater self lacks any sort of will whatsoever. Well, it does have a will, but it’s best to assume it doesn’t, as far as you all are concerned. So intrinsically, ‘I’ have no vector. However, when I received the name O, I also received meaning. Once I did, my ‘direction’ came about as a matter of course.”
“You’re saying there’s a reason why this ‘direction’ is fixated on Kazu?”
“Exactly. You are indeed quite quick on the uptake.”
It goes without saying that the remark was more contemptuous than complimentary.
That’s why O continues by saying, “It’s what keeps you from being able to use your Box fully.”
I bite down on my lip. I’m aware of this, but it stings to be told yet again.
“You cannot understand the Box as it is. You impose your own interpretation on it, distorting it and replacing it with something you are capable of comprehending. The Box as you envision it is something else entirely. Ah yes, it seems you believe I don’t find you to be of interest, but you believe incorrectly. You are the exact opposite of Kazuki; as he possesses the disposition to use a Box, you lack it entirely. That position is quite intriguing, in a sense,” O says with a bewitching smile. “I’m quite certain you will be the first to apprehend my true nature.”
Enough already!
If this being keeps dropping hints, I may be able to identify what they really are.
It’s true that O can change shapes as they please. I can’t tell if they are male or female, either. I have no way of knowing their original form or anything else.
But I have a certain talent for seeing the truth of things. I have an intellect, not that it does anyone any good.
If O becomes transparent to me, I will no longer be able to believe in the extraordinary powers of the Boxes. As long as O’s nature remains a mystery to me, I can consider the Boxes to be special.
This is why I will not try to warp O with my own interpretation of them.
I will venerate O and worship them.
And by continuing to avert my eyes from reality, I will enable my wish to be granted.
