Chapter 106 |
What do you say to someone who has become so accustomed to pain?
Kwon Yeonhee had never met anyone who attached the word ‘natural’ to every pain they experienced. He would likely be the first and last she’d ever encounter.
She grew up in a reasonably decent, if not exceptionally remarkable, family. Her parents wanted Kwon Yeonhee to be the kind of person who could help lift up a fallen child, not a saint of the century. They wanted her to understand that shades of gray existed between black and white. Kwon Yeonhee grew into precisely that kind of adult.
Therefore, she couldn’t react properly when confronted with something outside of her familiar moderate world. To Kwon Yeonhee, Lee Jaehun wasn’t black, white, or even gray.
She couldn’t even tell if she could call him a human being.
“…….”
Unable to contain her doubts, she blurted out,
“…Why did you become like this?”
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He didn’t have to accept the pain given to him as if it were natural or treat himself like an object. Even the most ordinary person had better common sense and lived a better life than him. So why did he, a department manager of a major corporation, act like this?
Even if it was because he’d been through this world many times, Kwon Yeonhee found it hard to accept.
“Does anyone… does anyone say you’re a bad person, Manager? That it’s okay for you to dⁱㅌ? That because you’re stronger and can handle more pain, it’s… okay for you to get hurt like that?”
“…….”
“Why do you think that way? We. Other people can use you as a shield, but only you… only you have to be hurt and suffer….”
She couldn’t understand it.
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“…Who the hㅌll told you that…?”
Kwon Yeonhee knew that Manager Lee Jaehun came from a well-off family. He was what they called a ‘royal’, with a prominent family background and a family business. His usual condescending, entitled behavior made sense given his background.
Perhaps Lee Jaehun was supposed to grow up like that. Looking down on and treating others like objects, bowing to those stronger than him. He should have been the ‘Department Manager Lee Jaehun’ they knew. An arrogant and incompetent person in power.
But the person he really saw as an object was himself. And Lee Jaeheun was neither arrogant nor incompetent. She couldn’t figure out why he was so twisted.
“Manager, you’re a human being.”
“…I know.”
“Are you sure you know…? You shouldn’t use the word ‘utilize’ when referring to a person.”
“Aren’t people also resources in a way?”
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“Then why don’t you do that to us? Why don’t you see us as tools? You could’ve abandoned us, dead weight that we are, and run away by yourself.”
“I could have… But you’re still weak. If you were a little stronger or more mature, I might have. I could have abandoned you and run away.”
“Really?”
“…….”
Lee Jaehun didn’t answer.
“…You’re lying.”
“…….”
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“You wouldn’t have run away alone.”
At her words, Lee Jaehun frowned as if a bit frustrated, but Kwon Yeonhee wasn’t fooled by that expression anymore. He had already bled too much to fool her with such a simple facade.
“Manager, you know. People worry.”
“…Do you think I don’t know that?”
“I think you don’t. When you get hurt in our place, stay behind, and come back bleeding, our hearts break.”
“You’re all so inefficient. Don’t you understand the benefit of sacrificing one to save everyone else?”
“It’s not ‘one,’ it’s ‘one person.’ It’s not efficiency, it’s sacrifice. I don’t know what kind of people you lived with in this world to make you this way, but please, come to your senses.”
“I’m always in my right mind.”
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“Then you’re crazy.”
“…….”
“And the people who were with you while you became this way are even crazier.”
Lee Jaehun’s brow furrowed deeper, but Kwon Yeonhee had no intention of retracting her words.
“It’s really strange. Why don’t you blame those people…? Why does only Manager have to get hurt? From the moment we got here, you’ve been getting hurt and suffering as if it’s natural. What did the people next to you say when they saw that? Did they also say it was natural for only you to get hurt?”
“…I wasn’t the only one who got hurt, and it’s only natural for the most capable person to step up….”
“It’s not natural at all. If you’re hurt, say something. If you’re injured, get some rest. I saw you scratching your neck in your sleep because you had a nightmare. Are you going to keep this up?”
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“It wasn’t a nightmare.”
“Then what kind of dream did you have that made you do that? Why did you scratch your neck, why did you struggle like that? You were thrashing around like you wanted to dⁱㅌ, and you even vomited blood. What are we supposed to think when we see that?”
“I really….”
“Ah, this person is normal…? He doesn’t feel pain at all? So I should just leech off him, cling to him like a tick, sʊck his blood like a leech. I should sacrifice the one person who can dⁱㅌ the least painfully so I can survive. Something like that….”
“…….”
“Do you think we would think like that?”
Kwon Yeonhee clenched her fists and continued.
“I don’t know what you heard or experienced to make you have such twisted common sense, Manager, but I can guarantee you one thing.”
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“…….”
“The people who were with you are all ⋏sshӨlㅌs.”
Lee Jaehun’s eyes twitched.
“It wasn’t… that bad. It was just. They were just ordinary people.”
“Why are you defending them?”
“…….”
“You call yourself bad, but why do you say they’re good?”
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“…That’s not what I meant.”
“But that’s how it is, Manager.”
Lee Jaehun, unable to answer, just opened and closed his mouth. After a moment, he carefully spoke, his expression looking a bit wronged.
“…If you were all as strong as me, it wouldn’t be like this.”
“And then what?”
“…….”
“If we become as strong as you, if we don’t feel pain… will you abandon us and run away?”
“No, I’ll cling to you and take everything I can.”
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“That’s good.”
“…….”
“That sounds… really good.”
She wasn’t lying, it was true.
“I don’t know if you really meant it or not, but don’t forget it. I’ll tell everyone else about this.”
“…Why are you doing this, really.”
“But, Manager, if we become that strong, if we can at least pull our own weight—”
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Kwon Yeonhee trailed off, silent for a long moment.
She had only lived through moderately difficult situations, not major ones. She grew up in a reasonably decent family. Despite her easygoing nature and her tendency to befriend everyone, she never crossed their boundaries. Even with her friends, Kwon Yeonhee always maintained a minimum line.
“…Then.”
The feeling of having to cross that line,
“Manager, why are you in so much pain now…?”
“…….”
“Can you tell me?
It was truly strange.
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“Can I ask you what happened that evening?”
* * *
“…Can I ask you what happened that evening?”
At Kwon Yeonhee’s question, Lee Jaehun blinked.
His momentary irritation at the clueless chick criticizing his past comrades quickly subsided as he acknowledged his poor physical and mental state and calmed himself down. After all, Kwon Yeonhee wasn’t criticizing his actual past comrades, but a figment of her imagination.
“That day… the vines. Ever since you were taken by them, Manager, you often didn’t look like a human being. Actually, I had a bit of that feeling before too….”
“…….”
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“It’s gotten worse. You weren’t like this before and you’re getting more absent-minded. Last time, you even put your hand in the campfire. Even if you were sleepy, that doesn’t make sense, does it? So….”
“…So.”
“What’s wrong, Manager?”
He considered it.
‘This is coming full circle.’
In any case, she had taken the bait he’d laid.
His initial strategy, ‘Actually, he wasn’t as bad as I thought’ had failed, leading to his current persona, ‘the survivor of the other world’, and in the process, due to the lucid dreaming incident where he coughed up red water, he took on the semblance of a ‘terminally ill patient’.
‘But that felt too implausible and over-the-top, so I blamed it on the green algae monster.’
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It was to provide a reason for why a perfectly healthy office worker suddenly started coughing up blood.
In fact, if it weren’t for this, Lee Jaehun would not have been so cautious about the group’s boundaries. Because of this unexpected setup, he had used the ‘Officer Kim Yeonwoo’ card too early, and as a result, he was forced to drag in Detective Hong Kyungjun and others. It was a significant loss.
“…….”
Of course, even if he hadn’t met the detective midway, he probably wouldn’t have abandoned them. Because they secured water early on, the survivors’ personalities were much more tolerant than in the original novel.
‘It’s a little unsettling that the killer joined the detective’s group, unlike the original story, but still.’
As long as they weren’t completely unusable, it was fine. He could nurture them and use them later, so there was no reason to discard them.
It seemed just securing water had improved the atmosphere more than he’d imagined, but as long as the outcome was right, that was all that mattered. Kwon Yeonhee was also asking a very appropriate question about the bait he needed to reel in.
‘As expected, there’s a use for everyone if you nurture them.’
Lee Jaehun took advantage of the brief silence to listen.
“…….”
The snoring had noticeably quieted.
He saw the faint shadows flickering behind Kwon Yeonhee and, after confirming they weren’t asleep, slowly opened his mouth.
“…Wouldn’t it be better for you not to know?”
He intended to tell her eventually, but still put on a reluctant expression. If he spilled everything just because she asked, it would create inconsistencies in his carefully constructed persona of secrecy.
“I am confident I won’t cause any trouble. Even if you don’t know anything, it won’t cause any significant harm to you or anyone else.”
“I hate that even more…. Did you listen to me at all?”
“…….”
“Unless telling me will kill either of us, I have to hear it. I’m sorry I ran away because I was scared, but I think I should know this much.”
“…Sigh….”
You asked.
You all know it’s not my fault, right?
* * *
A low sigh, the sound of hair being swept back.
“…….”
“…Assistant Manager….”
“Shh.”
Jung Inho listened intently while placing his hand on the shoulder of the intern crouching down next to him.
This place, which Yoon Garam said originally had a pavilion, was quite spacious, and those who had joined late volunteered to sleep near the entrance. Thanks to these factors, Jung Inho was able to quietly wake up Owner Yoon and Noh Yeonseok.
Of course, there was one person here Jung Inho hadn’t wanted to wake up.
“…I am being quiet.”
“…I know.”
It was Detective Hong Kyungjun.
Since Jung Inho followed Kwon Yeonhee as soon as she went outside, he couldn’t secretly sneak away from Detective Hong Kyungjun, who returned right after that. Detective Hong seemed to require little sleep, so even if he had been fast asleep, it would have been impossible to wake the others without him noticing.
‘He might be useful.’
Honestly, Jung Inho didn’t particularly like him, but he acknowledged Hong Kyungjun’s competence. For some reason, the detective seemed to have less suspicion toward Manager Lee Jaehun. So if he played his cards right, Detective Hong might be helpful in keeping Lee Jaehun with them.
That was precisely why Jung Inho had woken everyone in the original group. It was to stop Manager Lee Jaehun, who could dⁱㅌ at any moment, from running off.
‘If this many of us press him, it’ll be hard for him to act on his own.’
Surprisingly, Noh Yeonseok and Hong Kyungjun seemed to have some understanding of Manager Lee Jaehun’s past, so Jung Inho felt even less hesitant to act. If Lee Jaehun had already revealed that much, it meant he was ready for the next part of the story, didn’t it?
As Jung Inho quietly awaited Manager Lee Jaehun’s voice, he heard that characteristic low, mechanical tone. A voice that seemed to have deliberately suppressed all emotion.
“…To be honest, I don’t know exactly either.”
“…And?”
“I don’t remember that day clearly.”
For someone claiming memory loss, he was remarkably composed, but Jung Inho noticed the tremor at the end of his voice. It was understandable, considering he’d been dragged away and had nightmares; he couldn’t completely ignore the terror of that moment.
After hesitating a few more times, Lee Jaehun. responded with an unnervingly dry tone. It was as if he had cut off his own emotions.
If so, it meant he felt a need to erase his emotions.
“Sometimes, it happens.”
Jung Inho bit his lip.
“I feel an impulse.”
“…….”
“…To kill someone.”
Why, of all people, did it have to be this person?
It was as if the whole world was hoping for Lee Jaehun’s death.