Chapter 504: What He Wants (2) |
“And that is why he has been denying it,” I said.
“Me? I’m not denying it. I’m sure you still have no idea, but… there really aren’t any survivors. You’ll be able to see it yourself when we head out tomorrow. It’s not only Lindel, but Celia, the Republic, and the Union of Kingdoms as well. Of course, you won’t be able to find any members of the other races as well,” Kim Hyun-Sung explained.
“I wasn’t talking about—”
“I understand that there are a lot of things you don’t understand right now since you just woke up, but… I’ll explain everything. I should’ve explained this to you a long time ago, but first—Yeah, I’ll make sure to explain everything slowly and as fast as I can. Please rest for a bit,” he interrupted.
“So…”
“I’m sure it’s hard, but please don’t worry…” he said.
‘How can I not worry? You’re suffering from escapism, man.’
It was clear that my words weren’t going to reach him. It looked like he had already decided to accept the ongoing situation outside, and it was so absurd that I couldn’t help but laugh.
The fact that he seriously thought about how the two of us could live on a ruined continent startled me. It seemed like he wasn’t thinking about his current reality at all. He believed that this place was better than confronting the ongoing situation outside.
I couldn’t understand why he had gone this far just to fool himself. If he was aware of the fact that this space was his own construct, then it was highly likely that he was thinking that I was one of his constructs as well.
He was basically putting on a show for the imaginary Lee Ki-Young.
I thought of the possibility that he knew I had infiltrated his mind, but Lonovera had told me that it would be difficult for him to notice that I was an invader.
If he knew that I wasn’t an illusion but the real Lee Ki-Young, then I was sure that he wouldn’t act like this nor deny the truth just to keep me here.
‘Do you really have to go this far, Hyun-Sung?’
I thought I had given him enough time to rest, but it seemed that it wasn’t enough. Actually, it was more like he had given up on everything. I knew he was in serious condition, but his condition was more serious than I thought.
It was to the extent that I felt like giving him a punch or two.
I wasn’t sure how he was going to respond because his mental health was unstable.
However, I had to make him aware that the world in front of him wasn’t the real world.
‘How much time do I have left?’
An hour in the outside world was three days here. Naturally, I wasn’t planning on staying here for three days because I was worried about what Park Deok-Gu would do after being overwhelmed by emotions.
Before anything else, I decided to play along. I wasn’t sure if I could actually taste the food and drinks here, but when I drank the wine quietly, Kim Hyun-Sung started talking, which was unlike him.
The majority of the topics were useless. He talked about the old days as well, but he mentioned some fun stories, too.
“Do you still remember… the first time we met?” Kim Hyun-Sung asked.
“I do. It reminds me of the fact that you’ve changed. I thought you would be more cold-hearted… To be honest, just a few years ago, I had never imagined that I’d see you smiling,” I replied.
“I’m kind of embarrassed,” he commented.
“...”
“I never thought I’d change this much either, but it’s understandable that you’d feel that way. If I hadn’t met you, I’m sure I wouldn’t have changed at all. Basically, I’m kind of bad at communicating…” he continued.
“I didn’t feel that way,” I said.
“Really?” he asked.
‘No, you’re really bad at communicating, man.’
“Yes, but if that’s how you really felt, then I’m sure you’re not the only one who felt that way. The guild members…” I trailed off.
“You’re right, Mr. Ki-Young,” he said.
We started talking about our first meeting.
“I was really surprised when you gifted me a griffon,” he said.
“Ah, that was when I had just returned from the capital. I was worried that you wouldn’t like it, so I didn’t expect that you’d like it that much. I honestly never thought that you’d enjoy festivals or festival items. To be honest, I was kind of relieved. Anyway, I was really surprised because of Miss Jo Hye-Jin…”
“Hahaha. Really?” he laughed.
“You have no idea how startled I was when you suddenly appointed her as your secretary,” I answered.
“I-I’m sorry about that…” he stuttered.
We started talking about many things. We talked about the time I gifted him a griffon, we talked about stories related to Jo Hye-Jin, and we talked about the times we went out after expeditions. Of course, we also talked about the serious incidents.
They were all stories that the two of us could laugh about. It hadn’t been that long since we met, but we had spent a lot of time together, so we had many things in common.
We continued talking, and it was also a way for me to grasp his overall condition. Soon, it was morning, and I hadn’t even laid on the bed that he had made for me just yet. At this point, I felt like giving up as I watched him talk.
To be exact, I played along with him by nodding.
‘All right, do whatever you want, man.’
I wasn’t sure if there were any fish, but we went fishing together and wandered around Lindel with the goal of finding survivors. Obviously, we didn’t find any survivors because this was a world that his consciousness had constructed. I saw what remained of Lindel, and the places that had been razed to the ground caught my attention.
This was his past life. It was the world where Jung Ha-Yan had hung herself. Kasugano Yuno died here as well, along with all living beings, including Sun Hee-Young and Cha Hee-Ra. It would be strange if I weren’t curious.
We walked while looking here and there, and we eventually ended up in a place where we could see all of Lindel. Kim Hyun-Sung started talking as soon as he noticed that I was trying to catch my breath.
“Are you okay?” Kim Hyun-Sung asked.
“I’m… ha… a little tired…” I mumbled.
It seemed that my stamina was still low even in this world. Damn it.
“Ah, then let’s rest here for a bit, or we can stop here and call it a day. After all, we have a lot of time on our hands. There might be wild animals in the forest, and if we get lucky, we might even find a griffon. How about going there tomorrow?” he suggested.
‘Wild animals, my ass!’
“I don’t know. More importantly, I’d like to look around this place more or maybe… go to Laios…” I muttered.
“That place is probably worse than here. Here, drink some water,” he offered.
“Thank you.”
“Are you done catching your breath?” he asked.
“Yes, thank you. There really isn’t anything here. I don’t hear anything either…” I mentioned.
“Yes, it’s really quiet,” he agreed.
“...”
“Mr. Ki-Young,” he called out.
“Yes?”
“I think humans are really strange,” he started.
‘That’s random.’
“Everything has been destroyed, but everything kind of looks pretty and mysterious. The red sunset…” he trailed off.
“...it’s definitely picturesque. I thought it would be completely dark, but it looks like the sun still exists.” I pointed out.
“It didn’t rise once. I honestly haven’t seen anything that could be considered a light source, but you’ll be able to see a red sunset like this one during certain hours. Ah, when you leave a certain region, you can also see stars. Since we didn’t see any stars yesterday, I think we should go see them today. We do have to walk for three days before we get there, and since you’re tired, we should just go see them next time,” he explained.
“You seem to know more than I thought. How long have you been alone in this place?” I asked.
“I’m not sure. I don’t think it’s been that long,” he answered.
‘Yeah, right.’
There were things I could see through my Mind’s Eye, and I noticed traces of the things that had been created recently. I was sure that he created those traces unknowingly.
It was obvious why he made them…
I wasn’t certain, but there was a high chance that he remained by himself in this world.
I wasn’t sure if it was right before he regressed or if he remained in this place for a long time, but I was sure that Kim Hyun-Sung had stayed here for a long time. I didn’t know if it was days or years, but he had definitely been watching the sunset from this place.
I was sure that he had made sure to watch the sunset every day because it was the only phenomenon and the only change in this world that had allowed him to see things clearly in this dark world.
Did that mean that all of mankind disappeared? How did Hyun-Sung survive? There was a high chance that Altanus had protected him. In other words, were the things I was seeing right now the things Kim Hyun-Sung had seen before his regression?
I wasn’t sure, but there was a high chance that it was the case.
I was receiving so much new information that it was starting to give me a headache. To be honest, I wasn’t ready to accept any of those. I already had a lot on my plate, and his stories weren’t what was important right now.
I was sure that it wasn’t just me, but I felt as if the emotions he felt back in his past life were inundating me.
‘The dangers Lonovera had mentioned…’
I wasn’t sure if it were one of those, but I started crying for some reason. Kim Hyun-Sung looked away from the red sunset and asked cautiously, “M-Mr. Ki-Young? Are you okay? Why… Why are you suddenly…”
“It’s nothing,” I replied.
“...”
“It’s nothing,” I repeated.
“But right now…”
“Damn it! It’s really nothing!” I shouted.
“...”
“...”
“I’m sorry. I was too—”
“It’s nothing, so… don’t worry too much. Really…” I interrupted him.
“...”
“...”
“Mr. Ki-Young,” he called out.
“Yes?”
“I told you yesterday that I had something to tell you… There’s something I’d like to apologize for—”
“You don’t have to,” I said, interrupting him again.
“Excuse me?”
“You don’t have to apologize,” I said.
“What do—”
“I’m sure it wasn’t your intention to tell me about it like this, damn it,” I interrupted.
Kim Hyun-Sung bit his lips. I obviously knew what he wanted to tell me. He was definitely going to tell me that he was a regressor, and he was planning on ending it with that.
I was sure that he wanted to be freed from the burden he was carrying by abandoning it. He had definitely been thinking about it for quite a while now, and in the end, he decided to avoid it.
He wanted to avoid taking responsibility, he wanted to run away from his mistakes, from the truth, and avoid situations where he could possibly lose his comrades, close friends, or even his lover.
He had decided to let go of everything because he couldn’t endure it anymore, and he decided to use my appearance here to let go of everything.
My headache was bothering me, but I wasn’t going to accept his ridiculous apology.
‘I worked hard to raise you, but you’re actually trying to run away? You have to stay and carry me.’
The world here was constructed by his own consciousness, and it was a ruined world, so it was understandable that he was scared and was trying to run away from everything. Of course, I wouldn’t let him run away that easily.
“You’re not going to go out?” I asked.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kim Hyun-Sung said.
“You know what I’m talking about. You’re going to stay here like this? You’re really going to let things end this way? You dumbass. What are you so scared of that you’re staying here like this? You already know the truth,” I said.
“...”
“You know that all is fake,” I said.
“...”
“You noticed it as soon as you came back to your senses earlier, you bastard,” I continued.
There was a dull noise, and I stumbled backward until my back collided against something solid. I looked up and saw Kim Hyun-Sung glaring at me.
‘This bastard…’
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