Chapter 127 |
"I'm glad you remembered what I said."
At Yeon-woo's words as he handed over a teacup, Rawi made an awkward face.
"I don't think I did much besides spectate a disaster."
"I'd been planning to ask you to jab a sedative into this one's neck if it came to it."
Yeon-woo pointed at a slightly dazed-looking Seome.
"......"
"That was a joke, of course."
He added in his characteristically dry tone.
"Contrary to what you see in media, jabbing a needle raw into someone's neck is quite dangerous."
"It would be a problem if someone I've been trying to send out alive died in a place like this."
"You think we wouldn't find that a problem?"
His expression was distinctly unimpressed.
"I'm sorry I couldn't help, but is this, uh... resolved? Go easy on us, please. I'm an exceedingly fragile person, and if I get caught between clashing whales, I'm confident I'll pop in one shot."
"When you call it clashing whales, I'm no different from a shrimp."
"When you say that, what does that make me?"
Yeon-woo shrugged in lieu of an answer. His gaze settled on Seome.
"Are you more yourself now, Seome?"
"......"
Seome looked at Yeon-woo through hazy eyes.
"...My mind's been clear this whole time."
"Then let's address the attempted murder just now."
"Am I in trouble?"
"Were you hoping not to be?"
Yeon-woo's expression turned stern.
"Since when is putting a blade to someone's throat without warning called a rescue?"
Rawi, sipping tea, thought to himself.
'At last, a normal reprimand.'
It was practically the first commonsensical scolding he'd heard since coming to The Gaps.
"I understand my daily life looks bizarre to you. But that is your perspective alone. From my position, I was pursuing the optimal outcome — the cleanest, with the least difficult cleanup."
"......?"
Rawi tilted his head. Had that been normal after all?
"Yet your irrational 'salvation' nearly turned all my efforts to waste paper. How do you intend to take responsibility?"
"Uh, well."
Rawi watched Yeon-woo closely.
'That was the issue?'
Not the threat to his person?
But Yeon-woo continued, heedless of their reactions.
"Do not use others as an excuse to offload your own flimsy guilt. What you did was not an attempt to save me — it was draping your broken past over me and seeking comfort."
"No, that's."
"Quite a unique tantrum. But no matter how you dress it in good intentions, it remains attempted murder. I'm not so cheap as to deserve a sentimental culling."
Rawi's brow furrowed. And a non-sentimental culling would be fine?
'He's framing it as normal criticism, but the focus has been slightly off from the start.'
Still, Yeon-woo's words continued calmly.
"Were you aware? Behind the arrogant word 'save,' there is always the implicit premise: 'You are weaker than I am.'"
"That...."
"A seasoned mercenary should not have swung their weapon as an emotional garbage bin. Do not presume to measure the value of my life through the lens of your trauma."
"Uh, uhh...."
"If you genuinely wish to help someone, face your own rotting emotions squarely first, and relearn the practice of asking, with your mouth, what the other person needs."
Yeon-woo bent at the waist to meet Seome's eyes fully. At the very least, it was not a rebuke.
"That is basic courtesy. To me, and to yourself."
Tap!
He knocked on Seome's forehead as though rapping on a door.
"Do you understand?"
"......"
"Seome."
When no answer came, Yeon-woo added.
"When someone asks you a question, you answer."
"Y-yes."
"Excellent."
Rawi clapped.
"......?"
"Oh, I couldn't help myself."
Such a clean wrap-up.
"Have you ever attended a speech academy? You shatter bones with words. Honestly, you reminded me of a strict homeroom teacher from some movie, and I got chills."
"...Did I seem old-fashioned?"
"A touch vintage?"
"......"
He looked down at the finger he'd used to knock on Seome's forehead. He slowly uncurled and lowered his hand.
"My error."
Yeon-woo pressed the bridge of his nose as though suppressing embarrassment, with a short sigh.
"As Rawi pointed out, using the pretext of correcting rudeness to make unconsented physical contact is something I should apologize for. I have no standing to deliver one-sided lectures."
"Come on, if you take it that seriously, what does that make me for teasing you about being old-fashioned?"
"It makes you the person who teased me about being old-fashioned."
Ignoring Rawi, Yeon-woo spoke to Seome.
"I apologize for the discomfort just now. I'm aware this behavior is rude — a habit left over from my younger sibling, it seems. I mistook you for someone I should teach and talked down to you."
"Oh, no. If we're comparing wrongs, I was far more...."
"Offsetting wrongs to cover my own is not my way. We'll table the matter of attempted murder for later; for now, will you please accept my apology for my rudeness?"
"I... alright. I'll accept the apology...."
After hesitating, Seome added.
"I'm sorry too."
"Then let's draw a line under our respective mistakes for now."
Watching the two, Rawi said.
"Has anyone ever called you a scholar?"
"I won't be hearing that."
"Wow."
Rawi laughed.
'Would've been fun if someone like this had been at my school.'
The type who'd have been student council president — class president at minimum.
Instead of that oddly well-suited black suit, Rawi imagined him in a school uniform. Creaseless trousers, a name tag over the left breast, a dark blazer.
Imagining Yeon-woo's 'ordinary appearance,' Rawi suddenly thought.
'He's from the outside, so he must have gone to school... right? Surely?'
As Rawi was privately estimating Yeon-woo's age, the man continued.
"Rawi."
"Oh, yes?"
"Seome pushed herself too hard earlier and likely needs to settle down."
"This pattern's starting to feel familiar."
"Sharp."
He looked at the blinking Seome, then back at Rawi.
"If you've the energy, could you stop by the Dining and bring back some warm tea or sweets?"
"There was just a knife fight and you're asking me to leave? Leaving the two of them alone?"
"As you can see, things have settled. And...."
What was he thinking? When Yeon-woo didn't immediately continue, Rawi squinted and muttered.
"...If you want to have a secret conversation without me, you don't have to make it this obvious."
"There's no telling how things may unfold, and above all, Lover of Dawn is an annoying guest with easy access to others' memories and the ability to alter them. What you don't need to know is better left unknown."
At that, Rawi looked at Seome. The bewildered expression suggested this hadn't been agreed upon in advance. Then again, they'd been together the whole time — if it had happened, Rawi would have known.
Scratching his chin with the gun muzzle, Rawi asked.
"So sunbae-nim's recent strangeness was indeed aftereffects from Lover of Dawn?"
"Well observed."
Yeon-woo added.
"A guest with the unsavory hobby of shoving past ghosts in your face. It must have been devastating for someone already carrying trauma. The aftereffects surely played a part in Seome swinging the blade."
"Sounds like a warning to be careful. I agree, but...."
"And, Rawi."
Yeon-woo gestured casually at Rawi's hand.
"You should break that restless habit of scratching your chin with a loaded gun barrel during conversation. If it goes off by accident, the one who'll be exhausted is me."
"Oh boy, I forgot again."
Rawi was quick on the uptake. The lingering unease wasn't entirely gone, but he nodded.
"Ah, I'm scared to go alone~."
"I'll call a staff member for you."
"The hotel staff are equally scary."
"They won't harm you, rest assured."
"If you say so."
Rawi shrugged.
"...Please take care of our sunbae-nim."
Whatever exactly was happening behind the scenes — that Yeon-woo wanted, by whatever means, to get them out alive — was something Rawi could see without even trying.
And in Rawi's eyes, Seome was not welcome in this hotel....
***
....
....
By the window where moonlight of the small hours cut in, Seome organized the conversation.
"...Shall we do it tomorrow night?"
"Let's wait just a bit longer."
Yeon-woo continued, to Seome who was studying a sheet of paper.
"We may yet find a better method."
At that, Seome's gaze moved to the notebook that had been passed along with the paper. It was packed with handwriting in neat script. Yeon-woo extended his hand as if in invitation.
"So it would be best if you held onto these."
"If either of us loses them in the chaos, that'd be a disaster."
"I'm confident in safekeeping, of course, but my memories would undoubtedly be read."
"In that case, there's nothing for it."
"No."
He then added.
"I'm sorry this is the only method I have."
"No."
Seome gazed at the papers covered in neat handwriting, and smiled.
"This is more than enough."
For a mere mage who lived by stealing her sibling's body and life. It was a tremendously generous thing.
"See, you really are a kind person, aren't you...."
"......"
Silence lasted until Rawi returned.
***
"A thought just occurred to me."
Rawi said, setting down an armful of food and drinks on the table.
"Given how fearsome guests are roaming about, isn't it strange that I'm perfectly fine?"
"Is that a mystery to you?"
"Walking around at this hour with silent staff members gets you thinking all sorts of things. I wondered if it was like sunbae-nim's case, memories erased without knowing, but there's no sense of anything wrong with my memories. No panic attacks, nothing bewitching me."
"Good survival instincts."
"Can't tell if that's an insult or a compliment...."
At Yeon-woo's words, Rawi shrugged.
"Our sunbae-nim got thoroughly worked over. I wasn't exactly hiding somewhere. Given we were together the whole time, isn't it odd that our conditions are so different?"
Yeon-woo, having deftly arranged the refreshments, answered.
"You don't suit that guest's palate."
"Excuse me?"
"That guest feeds on relationships where someone is deeply enmeshed in another's life and blindly devoted. The type who willingly shoulders responsibility and affection, like Seome, is right up that guest's alley."
"I feel like I've heard something similar before."
He recalled the crispy fried fish.
"Is this the love thing again?"
"Closer to obsession."
"The form of the relationship doesn't matter?"
"It doesn't."
"Family, friends, lovers."
"Correct. That's why someone of Seome's type makes an excellent special meal."
"So right now, our sunbae-nim was in perfect 'sucker for the taking' condition?"
Rawi rolled his eyes and asked.
"Then what about me? I was right next to sunbae-nim the whole time. Why wasn't I targeted?"
"A type like you, Rawi, who draws lines on their own and avoids relationships — she doesn't bother, because there's no flavor."
He glanced at Rawi.
"Congratulations. You survived by being an individualist."
"......"
Rawi made an incredulous face at the matter-of-fact tone.
"...Saying that with a straight face, you come across as pretty nasty."
"I never said I wasn't."
"Why not just call me a loner outright?"
"I'm not so rude as that."
"You're making me out to be someone with zero social skills."
"In this place, it's an aptitude favorable to survival. Take it as a compliment."
"The way you talk, like someone worn down to the bone...."
Yeon-woo chuckled.
"Just a joke."
"I really think you're better off not joking."
"At least you won't be in trouble for swinging a blade and getting scolded by me, unlike Seome."
"Hey, I'm the well-behaved one here."
"I'll trust that."
Yeon-woo continued.
"So may I expect you to live up to that trust?"
"......"
I just dug my own grave.
"...May I take back what I said?"
"Only if you can take back that sentiment along with it."
"This really isn't easy."
Meanwhile, Seome, who'd been fidgeting, looked at Yeon-woo and spoke up.
"Um, your neck...."
"......?"
"It looks like you're doing something, but it's still bleeding. I did that."
"Ahh."
A gloved hand swiped the blood from his neck as though it were nothing.
"Work's been intense lately."
But unlike before, the wound didn't vanish at his gesture. The sight of blood continuing to trickle drew Rawi's uncomfortable gaze.
"Before, you used to just whoosh and regenerate?"
"Honestly speaking, I'm low on blood."
"Oh, Blood Magic...."
And then, CLATTER — Seome nearly fell off the chair as she whipped around to face Yeon-woo.
"Blood ma—?!"
Her face was beyond shock — it was terror.
"Bl-Blood Magic... you learned it? Don't tell me you're a blood mage...?"
"Where's the bravado that put a blade to my throat? You've gone white."
"No, that, no. Ah... ah...."
After fumbling and gaping, Seome slumped back into the chair.
"...No, at this point, being surprised by something like this is almost funny."
"This profession's reputation has certainly hit rock bottom."
"Today is the first time I've learned that a blood mage can maintain a complete human form without losing their mind. I'd heard there were no proper blood mages left."
"By that logic, it's quite an impressive credential."
Setting tea before Seome as well, Yeon-woo sat down with composure.
"Do tell me more. My education was haphazard, so I'm rather out of touch with industry trends."
"It'd all be things you probably know...."
"I don't."
"......"
Clink.
Seome, fiddling with the teacup, wore a dubious expression.
"...You don't?"
"The text I taught myself from didn't contain anything about industry reputation."
"Blood Magic can be self-taught? With the sheer amount of blood that goes into — oh."
A look of realization crossed her face.
"So that's why...."
"Why the look?"
Yeon-woo's expression went faintly sour. Undeterred, Seome asked.
"You're effectively immortal in this hotel, aren't you?"
"Not completely unkillable, but roughly half."
"Then your blood replenishes infinitely."
She added.
"That's why you never used anyone else's blood."
"Why would I use anyone else's?"
Yeon-woo frowned as though hearing something absurd.
"Blood Magic demands highly precise computational work. If blood of unknown origin were mixed in and a variable arose, the cleanup would be exhausting. There's no reason to invite that."
"And that's why you ground up your own body instead?"
"My blood is the highest-purity reference I can fully control. Diet, sleep volume, mana circulation cycle — I track all of it."
"Uh... is that important to you?"
"When there's no pressing need, why introduce external variables when there exists the one and only reagent that can bring the margin of error to near zero?"
He added.
"I'm also far more accustomed to it."
Yeon-woo recalled his previous laboratory.
'Managing test subjects was the worst part of the job.'
The fury of having to scrap an entire month's data because a subject had secretly eaten a midnight snack in violation of protocol was still vivid.
'After that, I started putting my own name on the subject roster — to minimize variables and create precise control groups.'
The subsequent process of filing justification documents with the ethics committee and writing budget-correction reports had left a kind of administrative trauma.
'Of course, now the research involves an entirely different subject that requires neither justification documents nor incident reports....'
Above all.
"There are no ethical issues, either."
"You don't include yourself in the category of ethics, I see."
"Personal risk that harms no one else is not subject to criminal penalty. It's closer to a maintenance cost that must be paid for system stability."
Rawi let out a disgusted scoff.
"Summarize that and it's 'I took the hit solo because I couldn't stand watching innocent people suffer.' What a touching spirit of sacrifice."
"I'd like to deny that."
His lifelong career on the science track, and the optimized work methods it had cultivated, were being reduced to the unscientific, sentimental concept of 'spirit of sacrifice.' He could not tolerate such a crude definition.
"I won't say there's none of that, but it's not the only reason."
"Making excuses for looking after people like it's hygiene management. You really do live exhaustingly."
"It's not an excuse. It's risk management."
Even as he said it, Yeon-woo cleanly gave up on further explanation against Rawi's firmly entrenched misunderstanding. There was no point wasting precious mental energy when the truth clearly wouldn't land.
Seome, who'd been listening, cut in.
"But it is a concern."
"Hardly worth worrying about...."
"Blood Magic is like that, isn't it? Every time it's cast, the blood's owner suffers horribly, and the more agonized the blood's state, the more exponentially the magic's effect increases...."
"......"
Yeon-woo thought to himself.
'Was that the case?'
He'd cast Blood Magic countless times but had never felt such pain. Even with pain blocked, the sensation should have registered — he couldn't have been mistaken.
'Or maybe the penalty differs by rank....'
The answer came from Seome, the veteran mercenary.
"Convenience probably increases with mastery, but the foundational rules of Blood Magic are supposedly like that. That's likely contributed to its poor reputation."
"Sunbae-nim, sunbae-nim. I have a question."
Rawi raised his hand.
"Are there, like, ranks? Proper nouns?"
"Uh... funny you'd know that of all things. How?"
"I heard Black Magic has something like that."
"Where on earth did you learn your Gaps knowledge that you start with Black Magic?"
"I was told if you meet a black mage, you're truly fucked."
"True, but you really did learn only survival essentials."
Despite her exasperated look, Seome continued.
"Blood Magic probably has ranks divided by mastery too. From the bottom: Smelt, Harna, Brime, Marvel, and Lidmar... I think."
At that, Yeon-woo blinked.
'...I was never taught any of that.'
And why wasn't there a rank called 'Velmareth'?
"...Why that reaction?"
"First time hearing it."
"'First time hearing it' — earlier too, don't tell me...."
She looked as though even forming the hypothesis was a struggle.
"You didn't learn it by choice?"
"Who would voluntarily learn such an exhausting discipline?"
At that dry answer, Rawi interjected.
"I was told it was learned so that you, me, and us wouldn't die."
"What — when did you hear that? Why didn't you tell me?"
"I was afraid sunbae-nim would charge at Yeon-woo on a crusade."
"I'm not so far gone as to attack a blood mage maintaining human form."
"Wasn't your sanity touch-and-go since coming to the hotel?"
"I can't argue with that one...."
Listening, Yeon-woo realized.
'Learning Blood Magic was a bigger penalty than I thought.'
The word 'crusade' had come up naturally. At this level, it was less a specialized profession and more plain monster classification.
'Even if I get these two out safely and eventually leave, life outside will be quite exhausting.'
This was exactly why he hadn't shared personal details. But it was a conversation Yeon-woo would have needed to hear eventually. If he was going to reveal it, doing so to two people on friendly terms was safer.
Fortunately, Seome seemed to have quickly accepted her own tragically tinted conclusion.
"May I respectfully kill you?"
"Respectful indeed."
The direction of acceptance was a bit off, though.
"This hotel alone is more than enough threat to my life."
"But the thing is, ah... in this situation, wouldn't dying actually be... a mercy...?"
"Now that you've found your manners, the requests have become more passive."
"Blood Magic itself causes the caster horrible suffering, doesn't it?"
Did it?
'Why have I been drawing blanks on this?'
Yeon-woo churned his brain. Ignoring this, Seome explained to Rawi.
"You're new, so this probably doesn't click, but Blood Magic is painful for both the caster and the sacrifice. Obviously it's thousands of times more painful for the sacrifice."
"Uh, but Yeon-woo handles both sides himself...."
"That's why dying would be a mercy."
"Ahh."
He'd appreciate it if they didn't rationalize his death amongst themselves without the person in question.
"Unfortunately, that won't be possible. I have a mountain of overdue work."
"But is this really...."
"I understand what you're imagining, but I'll decline premature sympathy. I'm fine."
"That can't be true."
"It doesn't hurt."
It genuinely wasn't that painful a state.
'When I first succeeded at the ritual, there was the discomfort of my body trying to dissolve into liquid blood, but I've since blocked that with the system.'
Nothing warranted this level of concern. But Seome seemed to find it very hard to believe. The distrust was plain on her face.
"I don't trust the word 'fine' from people like you."
"My credit rating is apparently that low. How unfair."
Yeon-woo didn't bother trying to explain. It would only be exhausting. Then Seome, who'd been earnestly deliberating on her own, continued.
"In your case, it's not illegal, technically... but the perception is just so bad."
"Uh, it's not? I thought it was a forbidden discipline where learning it alone puts you on a wanted list."
"No, that's Black Magic."
She drew a circle in the air with her hand as she explained.
"Only the ignorant are afraid. Even now, the bolder salons and guilds treat blood mages as rare, valued personnel. Especially in medicine — there's no magic as revolutionary...."
Revolutionary in medicine. Indeed, I wasn't the only one who thought so. Yeon-woo murmured inwardly.
"Killing people in The Gaps isn't even treated as a crime to begin with."
"......?"
Shouldn't it be?
"Messing with someone formally registered as a resident — that's a crime."
"I thought this every time during basic education, but the standards are awfully vague."
"The Gaps is chaotic in population, infrastructure, everything. They don't bother with the details."
Shouldn't they?
"Blood Magic's reputation only crashed to this extent starting about ten years ago. Before The Foundation was openly running rampant, Blood Magic was actually a fairly mainstream field."
"But now it's treated like Black Magic?"
"That's because of The Foundation. Blood Magic, used well, has an incredible range of applications, and in a way, it's quite efficient... so apparently there was a lot of demand."
Seome sighed.
"As you probably know already, one careless touch and this magic goes catastrophically wrong. Think of it as highly specialized personnel handling ultra-high-risk technology."
"Like nuclear technicians...."
"Incomparably more dangerous, because Blood Magic — one single mistake turns both the caster and everyone nearby into monsters. Plus, it's, well, hard to obtain research materials."
"Research materials... blood?"
"Mage blood in particular has poor research efficiency."
High technical failure risk, difficult to study because blood was the medium. Ethical issues when first learning, since human blood was required. Easy to inadvertently misuse the technique.
Having organized his thoughts that far, Yeon-woo thought to himself.
'I really did pick a garbage career.'
To think he'd end up choosing a research position with infrastructure this hellish.