Chapter 286 |
TL: TangSanFan
ED/PR: Tanthus
『Side Story』 Pursuing the Butterfly (13)
People can never truly understand others. In the end, the only person one can fully understand is oneself. It is possible to imagine things, being oneself. Lucy Mayrill could easily picture what she would have become had she lost Ed. Therefore, she could also predict to a great extent, how the Lucy of this world must have lived her life. She imagines, in a world without Ed Rothtaylor, how she must have survived.
How could she give life any value when bound by the last wishes of that man, to somehow survive no matter what, living a life where she could not die? She could ask the Lucy weeping in her arms right now about all of these things. However, there are things she understood without needing to ask. Embracing the grief-stricken Lucy, she sniffles. A thread of sorrow blooms within her usually expressionless demeanor, seeping into her aching heart.
The Lucy of this world, despite being alive, hadn’t revealed her survival to anyone. She had secluded herself without intervening in the hellish transformation of Acken Island, not appearing before anyone. There must have been a reason for it. It was more important than stopping the grief-stricken Yenika, or saving any remaining people on the island. With her own self as a reference, and having ample evidence, it was easy to guess.
– ‘After I decided to make this Acken Island a sanctuary, no matter how hard I searched every nook and cranny, I couldn’t find Ed’s body.’
– ‘You, did you take Ed’s body?’
Yenika conjectured that Lucy of this world must have taken Ed Rothtaylor’s body. It was a credible hypothesis because even Lucy herself would have done the same. If she lost Ed, she would have tried to bring him back. People can call a loss a loss and dismiss a past connection only after a long time has passed. She did let Gluckt go that way, but Ed wasn’t someone she could let go.
She must have preserved Ed’s body and continued to research the spell of divinity, scraping at the wound that hasn’t healed. It couldn’t be dismissed as a vain objective. She knew someone who had dedicated his life to researching the spell of divinity and actually accomplished the spell of resurrection: the late Professor Glast. Professor Glast chose not to use the spell of divinity to save Gluckt because Gluckt himself was someone who would have condemned such a violation of the natural order.
Resurrecting a great archmage against his will would have been an insult. However, Ed was different. To Lucy, he had become just as important, if not more so, than Gluckt. She did not need to adhere to any taboo; he was her only companion who understood and lived life with her.
It wasn’t hard to imagine that she’d do anything to bring Ed back. Nonetheless, Professor Glast was no longer in this world. His academic legacy had burned to ashes along with the academy. Lucy might be overwhelmingly superior in terms of magical power and application, yet she could not match the elderly professor’s academic understanding and research of the spell of divinity. Hence, she had to start from scratch in researching the spell herself.
Moreover, researching resurrection is viewed as the ultimate taboo in the field of magic. She couldn’t possibly ask anyone for help. Involvement in such matters would undoubtedly be followed by unpleasant consequences, and the more people involved, the more likely others are to detect the scheme.
So Lucy Mayrill needed an environment where she could be free from interference for a long time to research the spell of divinity. And that would be – Yenika’s sanctuary. This closed world of Acken Island would be the most ideal place.
She closes her eyes and imagines. The place… a cave on the western shore, where Gluckt’s grave was located, would have been fitting. Only Lucy and Ed knew of this space where she could pile up research facilities and cover them in stealth magic to prevent detection for years.
She would have preserved Ed’s body there, scraping research materials from the burnt remnants of the academy and advancing her study of the spell of divinity. Even if she succeeded in reviving Ed, she would become a mage recorded in history for committing taboo, an enemy of the magical community. Perhaps she would have to hide and flee for life like Zellan, yet she was willing to accept that.
Therefore, she shouldered the burden alone. She gladly immersed most of her life into research, writing down theories of divinity on hundreds and thousands of parchment sheets. Professor Glast dedicated his life to achieving the spell of resurrection. But Lucy was a genius in understanding magic and learning theories faster.
Although it was Professor Glast’s life work, it might not take Lucy as long to reach the same heights. Nevertheless, it was clear that it would still take a great deal of time. Whether it would be five years, or ten, she couldn’t be sure.
Years that felt like eons crawled by. Even as the world outside turned more hellish, and the light in people’s eyes faded. Sitting in the dark cave by the seacoast, pencil in hand, she continued to evolve and spread the theories of the spell of divinity.
The records of her research theories filled the cave, towering sky-high. Until one day, as she playfully fiddled with her hands, she would suddenly stop and revel in the feeling of time no longer ticking.
It was hard. Lonely. Sad. Painful.
At some point, she transcended those emotions and became engrossed in the singular goal of resurrection over the years. Eventually, a moment came when the emotional dike would crumble, and she would find herself overwhelmed by unstoppable tears. It is like that with emotions – they often burst forth intermittently, without warning.
That’s why she felt an oddly sad sensation upon seeing Zellan – she realized why…
She closes it.
The figure of the Cutter, Zellan, bears too striking a resemblance to the visage of Lucy, bereft of Ed.
Had she indeed lost Ed, she would have become like that aimlessly wandering mage herself.
Intuitively sensing the truth in this, Lucy knew she could never grow close to Zellan.
“It must have been difficult.”
Quietly opening her mouth, she pats her own back as she weeps in silence before her.
She cannot find a way to console the version of herself in front of her.
How many more years she must endure is incalculable.
The only thing Lucy can offer to this endless swamp of sorrow, a swamp whose extent she cannot even begin to gauge, is empathy for the pain.
The Lucy of this world was quite different from herself.
Her appearance somewhat more haggard, her body adorned with rolls of scrolls and books tied with twine for research purposes.
That alone made it clear… the hardships faced by this Lucy were not too dissimilar from those she herself had imagined.
However, overwhelmed by the sheer difficulty… Calling out to this Lucy was an act of desperation, unable to bear it any longer.
With her voice breaking, the exhausted girl speaks.
“You are the me I wish to become.”
Even if it feels like an incredible and distant goal now, unreachable no matter how far she stretches her hand.
She wanted to confirm that there was, indeed, a possibility of becoming that.
Life is by no means meaningless.
Everyone struggling to survive deserves respect.
Life is filled with value, and each day shines by its mere existence.
Even to this girl, the Lucy who could confront Yenika with such confidence would seem dazzling.
After all, even that version of herself existed somewhere in this vast world of possibilities.
Thus, there is no law that says she too could not become like that.
Embracing her grief-stricken self, Lucy nods without needing many words.
“Yes.”
Someday, all this sorrow will come to an end.
Even if it’s a distant, seemingly unattainable goal, by not stopping to move toward it, it will surely fall into her hands. Like chasing butterflies endlessly, only to one day find them resting beautifully in her palms.
Together, envisioning with her eyes closed, the day Ed would wake up after tirelessly researching the divine magic, raising its academic level to the pinnacle.
The resurrected Ed would emerge from his coffin with a defeated smile and welcome Lucy, who would cry and cling to him for a long time.
And then there would be much to do. The journey was far from over.
They would need to release Yenika trapped in the time prison, deal with Lortelle’s burning vengeance, and seek out Bellbrook, who would be recovering somewhere on the continent after taking a long rest, to bring everything to a conclusion.
Having succeeded in cutting out most of his heart, it wouldn’t be too difficult. Yet, it would still be a long adventure. Together, they would surely overcome countless trials.
After all that, they would just need to find a new place to call home.
Ed, officially dead, and Lucy, a breaker of taboos, would not be able to lead a particularly glamorous life. But that was alright.
Settling down in a cabin in the mountains of Rameln, or living by the sea on Clem’s coast, spending their days fishing, would be fine. Wherever they were, it wouldn’t matter much as long as they were together.
“When that time comes, you’ll be able to talk about how life is truly valuable.”
Lucy asserts.
The Lucy of this world might seem far removed from the current Lucy,
But someday, she will be able to regard her current pain as nothing more than a scar left behind by life.
Squeezing the arm that surrounds her, Lucy’s nose twitches with emotion.
“… Yes, it’s time to go back now.”
The Lucy of this world speaks, wiping away her tears.
But though she wishes to return, she has no magic left to do so. Having used all her magic to subdue Yenika, it would take at least a few years for Lucy to restore her powers.
However, the Lucy of this world pulls out a phoenix ring, cracked with wear from her breast pocket.
“That… that’s…”
In Glast’s world, the Golden Phoenix Ring was destroyed by forcing magic to subdue the Great Sage Sylvania.
But in this world, the phoenix ring remained intact.
Only then did Lucy recall that Sylvania had not interfered in this world. It wasn’t strange for Ed’s ring to still be there.
From the phoenix ring, a powerful magic begins to rise. Pulling all of the profound holy magic energy from it, the Lucy of this world hands all that power to the current Lucy.
Lucy, disbelieving, listens attentively to her other self.
“You don’t have enough magic. Without focusing your mind… you might not return to the world you desire. So… let go of all distractions now.”
“… What?”
“It was good to see your face. The fact that you are alive, affirming life with joy, is salvation enough for me.”
The wiping-eyed Lucy of this world speaks through gritted teeth.
“Now, it’s time to return to those who are searching for you.”
With sadness on her face, Lucy of this world speaks with resolution.
“When you return to the flow of that other world, concentrate and search for Ed Rothtaylor’s magic.”
In the swirling space of hundreds and thousands of streams, she must reach out and grasp the arms of Ed who must be searching for her.
“If it’s him, he’s still out there looking for you. You need to go back before it’s too late.”
“You are…”
“I have far too much left to do. I’m too busy.”
Lucy of this world says with a difficult smile.
For a Lucy who had rarely smiled in her life, her own face seemed awkward to her eyes.
Undoubtedly, an uncharacteristic habit developed from walking a thorny path.
“Thank you for being alive.”
With those words, Lucy is enveloped in a sense of weightlessness.
The power of divine magic wrapped around her body is at a level even higher than she knew.