Chapter 705: Chapter 623 |
Is it weird to say that good things came out of being a slave for a small period?
Sure, taking a new step forward with my Divine Power was important. Blah blah, getting stronger, refining my strength, and much celebration.
Anyways.
That pales in comparison to the fact that I have a ship that can fly in space.
This is now one of the best days of my life.
And I was doing laps around Asgard, in space, on my wooden ship.
"Fire the Cannons!" I yelled out.
"Firing the Cannons!" Brunnhilde answered back.
And the cannons below deck released a payload onto a drifting rock I was passing, blowing it into smithereens.
No, I would be the pirate.
Space Pirate Wilhelm.
Stealing from the rich, keeping for myself.
This was great.
The wind in my face—not actually wind, we were in space. But the metaphysical wind was in my face as I stood on the bow of my ship, sailing among the stars.
Gramps would be jealous.
They did a good job with the life-support systems. I could see the Magical Arrays light up under the flooring and the rails and shimmer into existence in a sort of bubble that sustained the ship.
Breathable air, minimalizing the influences of space travel, and even grounding everything inside with proper gravity.
Of course there were a plethora of other attributes that helped facilitate things. Lots of small details you don't realize until you try to make a spaceship.
I wasn't even being facetious with the whole 'wind in my hair' thing.
My hair was actually getting slightly blown back, but that was the Magical Arrays dispersing various forces across the shields and ship, providing a sense of movement to assist with vertigo and stability.
Essentially, it helps the people on board know where we're moving, which can be debilitating if the ship just went places and things around us changed shapes—getting closer or further away—without the brain going, 'How did we get here?'.
Apparently it's very common for Asgardian vessels.
Brunnhilde came up to take in the view. "How is it? Not bad for a maiden voyage, eh?"
"It's amazing." I didn't hold back my praise. "Thank you."
She grinned. "Too bad the Old Man was all 'Harumph, hmpmh, Grrr'— " She mimicked his grunting. "—When I asked him to come."
"Well…we have a complicated relationship."
Suffice to say, Odin didn't want to come for a ride.
Despite everything, we weren't really close, maybe even still just bearing the presence of the other. I think if I tried to stay here, wheedle into some corner, he would be not-so-nice about reminding me that I should go.
Obviously I have more decorum than trying to force a stay here, but the statement still stands.
"Just pull up here." She pointed me at the Bifrost as we got close.
I shrugged, listening to her advice.
It was kind of awkward because it wasn't really an unloading point, but considering we could just hop off and I could deposit my ship back into the storage, it wasn't much of an issue.
"Hello Heimdal." I greeted the Guardian God of Asgard.
"Greetings to you, Wilhelm Schweinorg." He had answered back the same before. "And Valkyrie Brunnhilde.'
"Ah." She held up a finger. "What did I say before?"
"Aunt." He corrected with a wry smile.
"Good boy." She grinned.
"You're older than Heimdal? I asked. Did I already know this, or did I forget?
"His mother was a Valkyrie, and she died in the line of duty, so he was raised by a group of others. I remember coming around to the fourth and seeing a little godling running around calling all of them 'mom.' " Brunnhilde chuckled.
"They were pleasant memories." He didn't correct it, so it must be true.
"Speaking of memories and the pleasantness therewithin." I took out another jar of peach wine and tossed it to him. He didn't even have to look my way to catch it. "Thanks for the help, Heimdal. I'm told you were searching tirelessly for me?"
"It was no different than my normal duties. But I am thankful for the treat, nonetheless."
Well, just as Frigga said, gratitude should be given when it's appropriate.
"Thank you," I said sincerely.
Brunnhilde pat my shoulder. "Alright, your ship is working fine; you're on your own now, scrawny boy. I'm going to hang out with Heimdal and bum some of that off him."
Heimdal didn't seem to mind, so I took that as my cue to give them some privacy.
I gave a gesture of goodbye before using a bit of Shunpo to travel across the bridge.
Not my fastest speed; I was taking it easy.
Easy for me.
Time to check up on the others.
Thankfully, I had a general idea of where the training yard was. It was sort of connected to the castle, sort of off to the side?
But it was easy to find and not far away.
As majestic as Asgard was, it wasn't very large.
I heard the sounds coming within rather quickly, and the voices that reached my ears were ones I was accustomed to.
Scathach was currently beating up quite a few Asgardians—nicely—in a manner of teaching, or sparring.
They're a warrior culture, I would presume; seeing Scathach and the others fight at their side, they were interested.
I glanced towards the 'stands,' sort of set up like a gladiator's arena, not really, I suppose. More like an amphitheater or a training yard that had seating around the edges that ascended upwards to look over it if anyone wanted to watch.
It wasn't just Scathach; as my favorite blonde knight got up from her seat and quickly came over.
She looked up at me warmly before going into a hug.
Artoria let out a high-pitched squeak as I swung her around once. The way she puffed up was always so cute that I couldn't help myself.
I'm glad they hadn't been hounding me about what happened and were fine with just seeing that I wasn't hurt.
A mental load off my shoulders.
"Love you."
"I love you as well." She returned without hesitation.
She grabbed my arm and led me over to the side where she was sitting.
"Yo." Mordred gave a wave. "You good?"
She showed her own concern.
"I'm good. Doctor's orders, though; gotta take it easy." I nodded.
Just a small smile was enough. Mordred still didn't do emotional connections well, so this was her being concerned, and I appreciated it.
"Clint Barton!" I said with exaggerated enthusiasm. "I heard that you're a hero!"
I saw him shooting sun arrows during the Sakaar thing.
"Am I? I don't feel like a hero. I feel like a guy with an overpowered bow." He responded good-naturedly. "Was talking with your…friends here."
Well, one lover, one daughter/son-in-law.
Calling them friends made it simpler I suppose.
I noticed he had my bow on his back, so he was keeping it safe, and I appreciated that he was doing it seriously.
I don't trust people with my treasures lightly, but he's shown that I could do so in the future.
"Mr. Barton was telling us about his work back home." Artoria said politely. "Mordred was enjoying the stories."
Mordred shot a thumbs-up, indicating that Artoria wasn't just being polite and humoring him. Frankly, they would be right up Mordred's alley. While she definitely enjoys just running in and fighting people, she appreciates fights on pretty much any level.
Regular humans fighting regular humans? She'd still enjoy that from the side.
She's not the type that goes, "They're so weak, I could do better!"
Well, not seriously.
"Did Asgard tell you to stay for medical checkups too?" I asked.
He unconsciously put a hand to his neck. "Yeah, they wanted to make sure the collars didn't leave any lasting effects. Bonus, apparently I had cancer, and they cured it. I mean, it wouldn't have shown up for at least a decade from what they said, but it was apparently easy enough to handle in just a 'basic checkup.' So, uh, there are some benefits."
I blinked and didn't know what to say.
Well, you're lucky!
Shit, even as happy as I am about my boat and everything else, I was not happy with my experiences on Sakaar.
Clint made a subtle gesturing motion, so I leaned in so he could whisper. "Not to, like accuse you or anything, or be weird, but I thought you said they were all older than you?" He glanced at Artoria.
"Oh yeah, she's older than me." I gave him a thumbs up.
That earned a dainty hand pulling on my cheek from Artoria.
She heard, apparently.
"It's rude to discuss a lady's age."
"Over a thousand," I reassured him.
"Wilhelm!" She flushed red.
Mordred found it funny, though.
"This guy is good with a bow; you should have seen him kicking these guys' asses. They kept wanting to challenge him to a contest, and he beat every one of them." Mordred grinned. "He could probably give that annoying harp bastard a run for his money."
That was high praise from Mordred.
"Beat them all?" I glanced Clint's way.
"Who do you think I am?" He shot back.
I'm sure it was humbling for a bunch of Asgardians to lose to a human.
Scathach spied me as she finished up with her sparring partners. That is, there were probably a dozen Asgardians sprawled out onto the ground and another dozen who were standing at the side catching their breaths from a previous beating.
"Student."
She looked at me sternly, but at this point, I could pick up the warmth in her tone.
I couldn't help myself; I buried my face into her chest just as she impaled her spear into the ground, and she accepted me. She ran a hand through my hair, whispering to me soothingly. "There, there, my student. I am here."
"Come." She pulled me up so my face was level with hers. "This Scathach is happy that you are safe and well."
She took the initiative to kiss me on the forehead, which made me feel a lot better overall. She was never the type that liked to show affection in public, or rather, in front of others.
At least strangers.
I loved her so much.
"Did you have fun beating up everyone here?" I asked her.
Her eyes smiled before her lips curled up. "It was enjoyable."
"Did you meet Clint yet?" I gestured to him loudly enough so it wasn't just sprung on him.
She put her hands on her hips. "I have met the Archer; he is quite skilled. I understand why you allowed him to use a bow."
She then poked me in the chest. "Sit, rest. I will not see you up and about if you don't need to be."
It was spoken, but she all but pushed my butt onto the seat.
"Watch him; he will do something foolish if we look away." The words were directed to Artoria.
"I will make sure he doesn't cause trouble." Artoria said very firmly.
"Stand up; it's time for the next round." Scathach shouted, pulling her spear free and walking back towards them.
I rolled my eyes.
Comparatively, they've gotten up to more shenanigans in their lives than I have. Sure, they're all much older than me and everything, but it's the principle.
Despite this, Artoria put a hand on my arm that basically was a warning not to do anything.
Affectionately.
But still quite firmly warning me all the same.
"Hey Clint, that bow looks awfully heavy on your back; why don't I take it back from you?"
"You know, it's really not that heavy." He grabbed it, holding it in his hands. "If you want, I would gladly hold onto it for you."
"Did you get attached?"
"Listen, I went through a shitty week. I think it's understandable that I get attached to a magic bow that shoots magic arrows."
I couldn't argue with that.
"Alright, give it back." I held my hand out in a gimme motion. He was just being playful; he didn't actually try to keep it, I don't think. Well, he would probably gladly keep it if I was like, 'Oh well, hold onto it,' or something.
"It's like watching my daughter run off to her first day of school all over again." He sighed dramatically.
"Clint, do you want a magic bow?" I offered plainly.
He opened his mouth, and I could tell he was about to just like unconsciously reject it, politely give thanks, and maybe say he doesn't need one.
But I think his brain did a quick reboot and something just clicked. "You know? I would really love a magic bow. If nothing else, I think it would make everything feel just a little less shitty."
I understood.
Despite the joke.
As much as I love my new ship, it was still shitty.
"Do you have any specifics? Size? Weight? Draw strength? Do you want it to shoot regular magic arrows, nothing spell-like? Draw the bowstring, and an arrow is created magically and is fired. Or do you want it to be like fire arrows, intent-seeking arrows, ice arrows, etc., etc.?
"I can customize?" His eyes widened. "Shit, give me a second."
There were moments in a man's life where he had to stop and make a heavy decision after some deliberation.
This was one of those moments.
I mean, when was the next time he was going to get offered a magic bow?
While he was thinking it over, the sound of thunder rumbled overhead, and a certain hammer-wielding god came flying over.
"There you are!" He announced himself loudly enough. "It's good to see you well, my friend!"
Thor was…honestly a lot different than when we first met. I think it wasn't all sincere, not like he was faking it on purpose and trying to trick people, but like…he was trying to be that sort of person.
He definitely had that attitude, he could make a room light up, he had the charisma. But he wasn't very well practied at it I think.
It was all him, but there were some missing pieces he was trying to fill in, like an idea he was picturing and wanted to become.
Or maybe I'm just overthinking it.
It's just, I keep comparing him to Thor in my head with how similar they are, and Thor just sort of feels more natural?
He was definitely better than that arrogant little shit when I first met him.
"Good to see you, Thor. Is Sakaar settled?" I hadn't actually asked that question yet, and maybe it was a pertinent one.
He smiled happily. "Sakaar has been conquered, and the mortals are being sent back to their home worlds, as much as we can. We have contacted other worlds where refugees can be sent so that they will be welcomed. It is not a short process, but not long either. The planet only had a handful of mortal cities that needed to be…freed."
Weirdly, it made me relax a bit.
Some tension I didn't realize I had before disappeared.
Like closing a book or turning a page on a chapter I didn't care to remember.
If it's settled, then I don't have to care anymore.
"It's impressive that Asgard could handle that mess so easily."
"Aye, Asgard is mighty, and the universe is reminded of it." He puffed up his chest.
Well, he's still the idiot who loves a good fight.
"Mighty indeed." I think even I underestimated Asgard's strength.
Thor chuckled. "I have noticed that your Divine Might is much stronger now as well. I look forward to a friendly spar in the future."
Oh?
Did my divine power feel stronger to him?
I'll need to ask Izzy about that when we get back.
@***@
Clint POV
I feel very out of place.
I'm just a guy with a bow. Technically, I don't even have a bow right now.
Soon.
My precious.
Still though, they were nice to a regular guy like me. Even the God of Thunder shook my hand as we were being sent off.
That counts for something, right?
I can tell my kids that I shook a god's hand.
I can't believe Wizard Boy was telling the truth. You know, screw everything else: magic, gods, aliens, whatever.
The thing that pisses me off the most is that he was telling the truth.
The kid really does have a harem.
And apparently, they're all a shit ton older than he is. I didn't want to judge; different cultures and everything, they're all adults, and I love my wife more than anything in the world except my kids, and I wouldn't want anyone else.
But even so.
Lucky Bastard.
If I thought I was capable of it, I would kick his ass. And it would be fully deserved, and I wouldn't feel any remorse about it.
Just one little kick, he would fall off this fancy rainbow road.
I don't even think anyone would mind.
And it's worse because they clearly all care about him too. The sickening sweet looks, the puppy dog eyes, the affection.
Bleh.
Fuck, I miss Laura and the kids.
They looked like they were arguing about something before Wizard Boy opened up some swirling rainbow portal, and most of them left.
Except one.
Read her file, Jeanne d'Arc.
Like, the Acutal one.
I wasn't even surprised anymore.
She grabbed onto his arm, and while he showed some manner of exasperation, he looked happy still.
"Trouble in paradise?" I may have said it a little mockingly.
He scrunched his nose. "Have you met? This is my minder, Jeanne. I said I was just going back to tell your Shield People I was fine, then check in on a couple friends before going home, but apparently, I'm not trusted with that."
"Be nice." Jeanne chided him. "It's because they were all worried."
"Yeah, yeah."
"We haven't met in person, but I read your file." I held my hand out, and she shook it politely. "Are you coming back with us? And out of curiosity, why no, uh…swirly portal thing?" Wouldn't it be easier to just do one of his portals that he showed?
"I figured it would be better to be…erm, loud on our return, right where we disappeared, and with Asgard's 'support.'"
Ah, he wanted to shove off responsibility to someone else.
I could dig it.
I think that was Odin who was standing not far back, and the queen?
I only met them briefly; I wasn't important enough to get like a face-to-face meeting. Whatever, this was already way above my pay grade as it was.
Joan of Arc waved goodbye, earning a wave in return from the Queen.
So the rumor that she was the queen's adopted daughter was real.
Thor smiled and waved too.
I recognized our 'trainer' from back on Sakaar as well. Turns out, she was a Valkyrie; that made things more convenient, I guess.
I unconsciously touched my new little toy on my back.
Despite my anxiousness, I did feel just a little bit giddy.
Magic bow, my own magic bow!
Okay Clint, keep your composure.
And definitely don't let the kids get their hands on this thing.
I still had the magic ring he gave me too. He didn't ask for it back, and I had the feeling that it was something forgettable for him. So, well, I wasn't going to say anything.
Who didn't want to feel super strong?
Pleasantries aside, we walked into the big round golden building that looked like it had a giant laser pointing out of it.
"Are you ready, Princess?" The god stood at the…controls? The controls, with his giant sword, like it was some kind of key.
"I'm ready, Heimdall, thank you for the help!" She cheerfully replied.
"As always, it is my duty and pleasure, Princess." He slotted his sword into the thing, the mechanism, and the building started to spin before it shot a rainbow light from the totally-not-a-laser.
The wizard boy put a hand on my back. "Okay, you're going to want to clench up so you don't have an accident."
"...what kind of accident?"
"The kind that you're wearing the wrong color of pants for."
"Ignore him, Clint Barton of Asgard; he speaks in falsehoods." Heimdal spoke with a dry tinge to his tone, giving Wizard Boy a small glare. "The Bifrost is not so indelicate."
"Well, that's good." Asshole.
He was probably doing it just to mess with me.
"But be careful on landing; mortals may experience some discomfort with a second taste of their earlier meal."
"...what?"
I felt a hand on my back as I was pushed inside the glowing, bright light.
Asshole.
I don't know what happened; it felt like I was being stretched like a rubber band, then snapped back into place, and then it felt like I was freefalling.
It reminded me of all the times I had to jump out of a plane.
But with stars passing by, galaxies, and I think I saw Earth for a brief moment.
It was beautiful.
Then it was like the universe remembered gravity existed and pulled me downwards. I thought I was going to hit the ground, but it was…soft, as soft as asphalt could be.
I fell to a knee, but I wasn't hurt.
"Trippy…."
"Good job; the first time's always the worst." The wizard boy patted my shoulder.
"Dick."
We were back home; I knew that because Shield immediately began swarming the area.
"Coulson." A familiar face that wasn't a god or a wizard or an alien. "I could kiss you."
"Please don't," he said plainly. "And it's good to see you back, Barton."
"Coulson!"
"Mr. Schweinorg, I hear you had quite the adventure. And Miss Arc." He greeted them both. "Am I to assume you will be willing to give Shield a debrief?"
"I'm just here to tell you I'm good. I think Clint can fill in the details well enough."
"Please keep in contact then, in case we have any questions."
Standard procedure was not to try and contain him. I could see that Coulson really wanted to tell him to stay and explain, but there were orders from high up.
Unfortunately, I still have to give a damn report.
"Agent Barton, prepare yourself for deanimation procedures; we're going into Protocol Alpha Red 7-15."
"Yeah…decontamination; I could use a good bath."
Wizard Boy gave me a pitiful look. "Good luck, Legolas."
Yeah, I was going to need it. "I owe you dinner. A good homecooked one." I wasn't loud, but Coulson did a double take, surprised.
Yeah, well, going through that shit, I think he earned the right to meet Laura and the kids at least.
He…was a nice guy.
Beyond Nat, Fury, and Coulson, no one else in Shield even knew about my family.
He gave me a nod before Coulson pulled me away.
"Clear the way; decontamination protocols are in effect. If you get close, you're getting put in a lab with us for a week." Coulson shouted, and everyone backed away as he led me to an unmarked SUV, opening the door for me.
"Hit it." Coulson spoke as he closed the door on his side, getting comfortable in the seat.
"Sir, Alpha Red 7-15 aren't contamination protocols," I stated.
"You're right, they aren't." The passenger seat mechanically spun around.
"Sir," I stiffened.
"At ease, Agent," Director Fury responded. "We have a thirty-minute drive according to traffic; we're going to make the most of it. Thanks to our friends from above, we knew when you were coming, so we had time for an off-the-record debrief."
"Sir?"
"That means tell me what happened, Agent," Fury said plainly.
"That's…going to be difficult to do in just thirty minutes."
Fury pulled out his phone and pressed a few buttons. "There's an accident three blocks down; it'll keep us stuck for an extra twenty minutes at most. Proceed, Agent."
"Uh…I ended up on an alien planet?"
They both perked up.
"Before I begin, it's going to get weird."
"Weird is my wheelhouse." Fury looked unphased.
"I shot down alien spaceships with a magic bow." I said very plainly. "Permission to speak casually?
"...I'll keep an open mind." He corrected. "We'll decide what to say officially in your report later; tell me what happened in your own words."
I let out a sigh. Better just rip the Band-Aid off. "It started off when the demon sort of exploded and pulled me and the wizard into a portal, and we ended up in another dimension. There was apparently some Eldritch demon god in there; we ran and got flung to another planet where we became alien gladiators."
"Agent, just a warning, you will be getting drug tested as part of your medical exam," Fury told me.
"It gets weirder, sir."
Fury let out a long sigh.
Yeah, I felt the same.
[Line break]
A/N
Sakaar is over.
Wilhelm is going over to Kamar-Taj next chapter, then back home, and we move on to other things. A new arc is coming up soonish, the world is already up over for subs. Dealing with Rias's Rating Game then right on over.
I'm doing better now. My surgery didn't have any complications. Just dealing with pain and stitches which need pain meds more often than not the past few days, but it's gradually getting better.
If you want to read 10 chapters ahead or support me, visit my p.a.t.r.e.o.n.c.o.m / astoryforone
I also have a boosty if you can't use the above under the same name