Chapter 58: Fans of the Dragon’s Descendant |
Yu Xiao was speechless. She hoped that the others at the Sixth Hospital would only consider choices 1 and 2 as a last resort. Maybe it would work, maybe it wouldn’t, but it was better than giving up.
“I guess I’ll hit the hay,” she yawned and stretched, feeling every muscle ache. She had spent the last two days in the instance, working like a slave. It was exhausting, even the “Thousand Year Kill” move took its toll… She shuddered as she remembered those horse squeals.
Argh, why did this come back to mind again?
She pushed the memory away and crawled into bed. She needed some sleep, badly.
She fell asleep almost instantly and dreamed of something wonderfully delicious. She couldn’t recall the details, but it left her with a warm and fuzzy feeling. She wished she could stay in that dream forever.
But then, the alarm went off.
“Ding dong!”
Yu Xiao blinked her eyes open, groaning. The dream faded, leaving her with a vague sense of regret. She wondered if she could catch it again if she closed her eyes for just a few more minutes.
But then, she heard the soft music.
Yu Xiao: “!!!”
She turned her head and saw Zhao Lan and Zhou Xiao Zhen sitting on their beds, drinking hot water and enjoying the music. They looked relaxed and refreshed, as if they had slept well.
“It’s 8 o’clock!” Yu Xiao cried out, panic rising in her chest. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”
Zhao Lan gave her an innocent look. “There’s no instance today, why wake you up? Wouldn’t you rather sleep a little longer?”
Yu Xiao felt a surge of panic and hid her face under the blanket. Oh, no. Was this how she was going to die? Socially, without any warning?
Zhou Xiao Zhen frowned. “What’s wrong with Smiley? When you had a lovely sleep, you should be happy.”
“Perhaps she slept poorly?” Zhao Lan suggested. “Did you have a bad dream, Smiley?”
“No way,” Zhou Xiao Zhen said. “Smiley had the sweetest dreams last night. I got up in the middle of the night to use the loo, and I heard her giggling. I nearly wet myself, thinking the ward ghost had snuck in.”
They were chatting away, when the morning news radio interrupted them.
“Let’s start this beautiful day~ And now, the morning news from the hospital.”
“Recently, a large number of patients have been wilfully damaging the toilets during treatment, resulting in grave and negative consequences. Our hospital leadership urges everyone to respect the environment, maintain public hygiene, and be civilised patients…”
Yu Xiao’s heart lurched as she heard this news.
Zhou Xiao Zhen was baffled. “Why are so many people wrecking the toilets? Is there a spook in there?”
“Maybe not for that reason,” Zhao Lan said, her eyes gleaming with mischief. “Remember when Smiley got that title from the Village? ‘Shit-Hole Destroyer’. Maybe they’re all jealous and want to be like Smiley.”
Yu Xiao felt a cold sweat on her palms, which she kept hidden under the blanket. What else was left for her in this world? Might as well destroy it while you can!
“There’s an opening for the village doctor position in Gu Family Village. Now hiring an attending doctor. Gender and age are no barriers, but work experience must be at least forty years…”
“Yesterday, there was a mishap at the Lolita Amusement Park, with some of the gaming facilities ruined. Repair work is in progress, and Lolita Amusement Park is closed to visitors for the time being…”
Yu Xiao heard this and thought, no wonder Lolita was so furious when she smashed the bungee jump machine. It would take ages to fix. But what she couldn’t understand was, why bother? The amusement park was going to burn down in two days anyway. Wouldn’t that also destroy all the machines?
“…Patient nicknamed ‘Cute Fairy’ from the Fourth Hospital displayed outstanding performance in yesterday’s treatment session and received the honorary title of ‘Demolition Crew Member’. Let’s give her a round of applause.”
“Is that Xie Meng Meng?” Zhou Xiao Zhen wondered. “Same as our titles.”
“Must be her,” Zhao Lan agreed. “Everyone had a hand in wrecking the gaming facilities.”
“Patient nicknamed ‘Money Money Money’ from the Fourth Hospital displayed outstanding performance in yesterday’s treatment session and received the honorary title of ‘Demolition Crew Member’. Let’s give her a round of applause.”
“…”
The broadcast from Fourth Hospital faded, followed by Fifth Hospital, and then… Yu Xiao clenched her fists.
“Yesterday, the patient nicknamed ‘Deaf Descendant’
from Sixth Hospital stayed on top, let’s give her a big cheer…”
**
At that moment, Xie Meng Meng and Qian Xin from Fourth Hospital were baffled.
“We both have titles, it makes no sense for Yu Xiao to have none,” Qian Xin said, her brow furrowed. “What’s going on?”
Xie Meng Meng also had a head full of question marks. “Yeah, it doesn’t add up.”
The news went on.
“…the patient has displayed remarkable performance during the treatment, earning the three illustrious titles of ‘Demolition Crew Leader’, ‘Amusement Park Bully’, and ‘Deadly Arse Assassin’. Let’s applaud her warmly!”
“…”
**
Zhou Xiao Zhen and Zhao Lan, who had been listening to the news with interest, suddenly went quiet.
After a pause, Zhou Xiao Zhen said, “I think I heard something odd just then. Misty, did you catch it too?”
“Yeah,” Zhao Lan agreed. “I heard it.”
“So…” Zhou Xiao Zhen glanced at Yu Xiao, who was buried under her blanket, still as a corpse. “Smiley, she…”
“Shh.” Zhao Lan put a finger to her mouth. “Don’t bother Smiley, let her sleep off her shame.
“Furthermore, the patient known as ‘Nickname Hassle’ dazzled in yesterday’s session, snatching the illustrious titles of ‘Demolition Crew Member’ and ‘Bully’s Accomplice’…”
“…In the meantime, the patient nicknamed ‘Braised Egg Girl 438’ sparkled in yesterday’s session, securing the esteemed title of ‘Demolition Crew Member,’ let’s applaud her…”
As the morning news wrapped up, the ward lapsed into silence.
Zhao Lan and Zhou Xiao Zhen exchanged a glance, communicating silently.
— Why ain’t ya speakin’?
— Why ain’t you talkin’?
— You go first then.
— Hmph, ain’t gonna…
“Ahem.” Zhao Lan cleared her throat. “Come on, Smiley, it’s not a big deal. The actual content of the title doesn’t matter; what matters is having it. You have no idea how many people are jealous of you for suddenly acquiring three titles and earning twelve points.”
“Does the actual content of the title really not matter?” Zhou Xiao Zhen asked, looking perplexed. “Then why do so many people imitate Smiley blowing up loos? Hey Misty, do you think next time the news will ask everyone not to bother NPCs’ back gardens?”
Zhao Lan was dumbstruck. She thought, Precious, oh Precious, how could you just rubb salt into your girlfriend’s wound like this?”
Zhou Xiao Zhen was equally stunned, but for a different reason. She had never seen such a title before. It was both ridiculous and impressive. She made a silent vow to herself. Next time they entered the instance, she would not hold back. She would strive to earn a few more titles of her own.
After that, the two began to chat, and Yu Xiao slowly relaxed. It was just a title, what did it matter? Anyway, no one knew who she was.
“I really want to live another five hundred years~…” The ringtone shattered the moment.
Yu Xiao groaned and reached for her phone under the pillow. She answered it without looking at the caller ID. She regretted it immediately.
As soon as she answered, she heard Lu Xun’s jovial voice on the other end, “Hahaha… Hey, did you catch the news? Brilliant, you got three more titles again. Oh, by the way, what’s the story with your last title? ‘Deadly Arse Assassin’? Whose arse did you assassinate…”
Yu Xiao rolled her eyes, feeling faint.
**
The Fourth Institute forum was abuzz with excitement once again.
Xie Meng Meng’s post was back at the top.
【OP, have you heard the latest? You’ve been duped. The big shot from the Fourth Hospital is none other than my pal Dragon Bro.】
【Judging by this post and your title, you’ve fallen for a massive hoax.】
【What Dragon Bro?! Did you lot even read the thread? OP said the three big shots are all gals, and the Dragon’s Descendant is a chick!】
【Sure, It’s a shocker that the top ranker from the Sixth Hospital is a chick, but I’m telling you, I’m the Dragon’s Descendant. I’m not a chick, and her nickname is certainly not those two words!】
【”Wow! My Dragon Sis is amazing!】
【”If the Dragon’s Descendant is a gal, then how do you explain the last news, where both the Dragon’s Descendant and Zhuge married the Village Chief at the same time?】
【Why are all flustered by ‘Zhuge Liang burning the Spider Web Cave’ preferences…】
“So, it turns out Yu Xiao is Dragon Bro… No, Dragon Sis!” Xie Meng Meng blurted out, her eyes wide. “She tricked me, the cheeky sod, how infuriating!”
Qian Xin watched Xie Meng Meng flush and fidget, too weary to say anything. How could she find that infuriating when she was practically swooning?
“Top post is all about Yu Xiao,” Qian Xin announced as she opened a thread.
【I’m following Big Dragon Sis’s example to earn a title!】
【After seeing Dragon Sis get the ‘Shit-Hole Destroyer’ title in the last news, I had an idea. Normal titles might be out of reach, but ones with strong practicality might be possible. So, when we entered the instance, my mates and I smashed all the toilets inside, which resulted in us being hunted by NPCs for the whole instance.】
【So, you’re the ones who ruined the toilets in the news?】
【Well…I was part of it.】
【Even though it’s embarrassing, I did it too.】
【 +1 】
【So, OP, did you get the title?】
【Obviously not, if I had a title, it would have been in the news.】
【OP looks so pathetic from this angle, so cute…】
【Even though I failed, I won’t give up on any chance to earn a title. This time, another title with strong practicality showed up in Dragon Sis’s list, ‘Deadly Arse Assassin’! I’m applying for it tonight and planning to give it a go in the instance. Brothers, wish me luck!】
【666.】 (In Chinese internet culture, “666” is often used to express admiration or praise, similar to saying “good job” or “well done” in English. The number “6” is considered lucky in Chinese culture, and repeating it three times adds emphasis,)
【Don’t forget to share your battle achievements when you return!】
【I hope the OP survives rather than getting some silly title.】
【Please stay alive.】
【…】
Yu Xiao had finally steeled herself. So what if two strangers had seen her embarrassing titles? What did it matter? Once she left the hospital, she would never cross paths with them again.
Phew~ Yu Xiao breathed a sigh of relief. Stay calm, stay calm. After this nightmare, nothing could shake her.
With a new resolve, she tossed aside the covers and got out of bed, eager to wash her face and have breakfast.
“I really want to live for another five hundred years…”
The phone rang again. Yu Xiao grabbed it and saw it was Lu Xun.
Answering the call, Yu Xiao shouted, “Do you dare to mock me again?! Watch out, or I’ll use the ‘Deadly Arse Assassin’ move on you?!”
“…” After a pause of silence, Luo Jin on the other end of the phone said, “I didn’t mock.”
Yu Xiao: “…”
She heard someone next to Luo Jin murmur softly over the phone, “You were laughing with me just a moment ago.”
Yu Xiao: “…”
“Ahem.” Luo Jin cleared his throat and adopted a serious tone. “I called you to ask you something. Can you tell me more about the world outside the amusement park?”
Yu Xiao felt her anger subside a little; there were still some decent people in this world.
She had nothing to hide and told him everything that had happened to her after she left the amusement park.
Luo Jin listened attentively and then asked, “Do you think that’s also part of the instance?”
“I don’t think so,” Yu Xiao said, “That place felt different from the amusement park to me, and Lolita never left the amusement park.”
“Thank you for sharing all this with me,” Luo Jin said gratefully, “There’s one more thing I’m curious about, I wonder if you can tell me.”
Yu Xiao: “Sure.”
Luo Jin: “Who was your target for ‘Deadly Arse Assassin’? Was it human or ghost? Was it Lolita? Did you make her cry like that?”