718 Tearful eyes
Tessa felt an uncomfortable tightness in her chest, either a heartbreaking pain, or a stuffy feeling that seemed like she couldn't breathe. She lowered her head, took a deep breath, and then she saw someone sitting there in her peripheral vision. William on the left, with tears streaming down his face.
William just sat there quietly, with a smile on his lips, but the tears continued to fall down like broken pearls. He did not raise his hands to wipe them, nor did he sob or suffer, he just kept silent. She quietly let her tears fall. Tessa's nose suddenly felt sore, her chest was so tight that her stomach tumbled, and she almost vomited..
Death has become more real than ever before. When life truly comes to an end, it is not the earth-shattering and vigorous as described in movies or books, but more of a kind of silence, like autumn leaves falling, silent, but outlining the desolation bit by bit. and loneliness.
He raised his head again, looked at Adam calmly, and stated to Catherine how death is a normal thing, because "everyone will die, but the time is different."”.
The pale lips have no blood at all; the sunken eyes have thick black circles mixed with a trace of blood; the haggard cheeks have no luster; only those eyes, those dark brown eyes, The dim light was still flowing, and a touch of sadness and helplessness was surging. As he spoke, his eyes became red, and before the thin mist even had time to condense, he blinked and That trace of fragility was hidden, leaving only those quiet and sad eyes, like a bright moon in the still water, shattered at a touch.
Tessa's heart was tugged like this, as if a big hand was grabbing it hard, harder, harder.
Chemotherapy did not work, and surgery was the only way. However, because the size of the tumor was larger than expected, the risks of surgery were difficult to predict. This was not a "50/50" problem. There was no chance of success, it was just a gamble. Even the attending doctor was They won't be able to make any assessment until the surgery is over..
So, this is the end, this is the fork in the road of death.
Anger finally dominated Adam's brain. He blamed Catherine for being unhelpful, he blamed his mother for being overly controlling, he blamed Kyle for being selfish, and he blamed the damn cancer for completely ruining his entire life. He Like a lunatic, he drove the car across the road, risking his life; like a lunatic, he drove Kyle out of the passenger seat and beat the steering wheel crazily, venting his inner anger wantonly..
“Ah..." Adam grabbed the steering wheel with both hands and shouted loudly, as if the last brilliance and brilliance of his life were blooming. The tearing voice was so angry, so helpless, and so painful..
Tessa covered her mouth tightly, her vision blurred by hot tears. She lowered her head in embarrassment and quickly wiped away the tears, but burned the back of her hand. Then Tessa saw William's shoulders shaking slightly. He gritted his teeth tightly, his whole face tensed to the extreme, and tears continued to fall down. His lips, which were slightly white due to too much exertion, betrayed his vulnerability at this moment..
Any language is pale at this moment. Because in the face of death, any excuse, any description, and any action are so insignificant. He is so young, he is so healthy, he is so sunny, he is so energetic, He is so kind, and he is so sincere... There is too much ugliness in this world, but in real life, it is always the good things that bear the heart-breaking despair..
Just thinking of this, Tessa felt that she could no longer hold on, and her tears completely burst into tears..
After venting, Adam finally calmed down and gradually put his life back on track: he prepared food for the dog, he organized the cupboards that had not been cleaned for a long time, and he put away The mess in the bathroom, he threw away the garbage in the kitchen, he changed the sheets and bedspreads for the room... Finally, at midnight, he left the house, walked along the familiar streets, and measured the details of his life with his feet bit by bit.
This is a farewell. Maybe it’s a farewell to the past life and embracing a new future; maybe it’s a farewell to myself, saying goodbye to everything in life and sleeping forever. Finally, looking at myself in the bathroom mirror, bald, haggard, With dark circles under his eyes and a bloodless face, there is a faint light dancing in the depths of his eyes, which seems to disappear at any time, but is always bright..
Turn off the lights and go to sleep. Good night.
It was such a calm scene, such a trivial detail, but it shattered all of Tessa's defenses. Seeing Adam's every move, so real, yet so unreal, she could not help crying. Those deep eyes The light everywhere, she just wants to hold on tightly, hold on, hold on.
Fifty percent chance, what does this mean?？
Sitting on the hospital bed, the doctors explained the precautions and asked Adam to sign relevant documents, and then began pre-operative preparations. His father and mother were by his side, and his father came up with a smile on his face and patted Adam on the shoulder. Carefully showing off, "I have a new coat.”
“Yeah? "Adam retracted his chin with a smile and listened carefully..
“It's from Brooks Brothers." The father became more and more happy as he talked, just like a child, "The pocket is made of silk, you can touch it and see! Adam actually reached into his pocket and touched the lining, "How do you feel?"？”
“Very good." Adam smiled brightly, nodded in approval, then took out his hand and patted his father's shoulder gently, "Listen, I know it's a little difficult for you to keep up with the current situation. But I just want to let you know that I love you, a lot." Adam looked at his father firmly with a smile, the light in his eyes gradually became brighter, and the curve of the corners of his mouth was so beautiful..
The father looked at Adam and was suddenly stunned. His smile disappeared little by little, and his eyes became red inexplicably. "Okay." His voice was choked with sobs. But he still didn't know what happened, and his face was confused. Confused, he raised his head and looked at his wife, looking for help..
Just such a small movement made Adam's voice choked up. The anesthesiologist came over to perform anesthesia, "Please relax, I will inject the anesthetic into your infusion tube. It will take a while for the drug to take effect." start to work.”
“Do you...do you want to start now? Adam asked in a panic. The nurse began to invite his parents to wait in the waiting room, but Adam couldn't help but continue to ask, "How long will the effect of the medicine last?"？”
“It varies from person to person," said the anesthesiologist..
“Yes." Adam nodded, "But, how do you know that the medicine will be effective long enough that I will not wake up during the operation? How do you know that the medicine will not be effective for so long that I will never wake up? ." As he spoke, Adam paused. His eyes were blank and shaking violently. He couldn't help but start asking for help, "Mom.？”
Mother hurriedly leaned forward and hugged Adam, "Baby, you will be fine." She held her tightly as tears fell down. She quickly raised her hands to wipe them away, making sure not to let Adam see them..
Adam gritted his teeth and tried his best to suppress and control, but tears still filled his eyes. The confusion, helplessness and fear in his eyes spread out like ripples, so small, yet so majestic, so Calm, yet so turbulent. This is the first time Adam has cried. This is the first time since the cancer diagnosis..
Tessa finally couldn't bear it anymore and covered her mouth with both hands, but her whole body still completely fell apart. Not because of fear, but because of life. Life is so great, yet so fragile, life is so colorful, yet so... Pale. At this moment, she finally understood the meaning of Renly's words before the movie was shown.：
Movies are important, but there are many things in life that are more important than movies.
Thinking of tonight's accident, thinking of Renly's anger when facing reporters, and thinking of the moment of silence before Renly spoke. Tessa completely burst into tears, watching Adam being slowly pushed in. In the operating room, I saw my parents sitting blankly in the waiting room, I watched Kyle standing alone outside smoking a cigarette, I watched Catherine being absent-minded during the discussion...the tears couldn't stop at all..
It’s not just Tessa, it’s not just Hope and William. The entire screening room is silent, a quiet and sad silence. You can vaguely hear the sound of wiping tears, and you can also hear the beating of the heart. At this moment, at this moment tonight, "Fighting Cancer" has become so special, so beautiful, and so heavy. Stripped of the excitement of the premiere, stripped of the film's commonality of entertainment, art, and life Everything has become more real than ever before.
After five hours of waiting, the operation was finally over. The doctor spoke a lot of professional terms that were incomprehensible, making people wonder if they were in English. Finally, he said something that everyone could understand, " ...But, he will be fine." A long sigh of relief could be heard in the audience, especially when Kyle complained, "You should have said this from the beginning, okay?" Audience? The collective burst into laughter.
Tessa couldn't help bursting into laughter. Then, the movie entered the comedy mode again. After the operation, Adam, who still had the effect of the anesthesia, was like a child, mumbling all kinds of nonsense, so cute and playful Her appearance was definitely something people had never seen before. Tessa was laughing so hard that her cheeks hurt..
After being discharged from the hospital, he returned to Adam's apartment. Kyle changed his dressing in person. The two bastards bickered again. The audience in the cinema laughed until they had no friends. After finishing the treatment, Adam stood in front of the mirror and looked at himself up and down. He couldn't help but laugh, "This is so crazy. I look pretty handsome.".”
“I want to have sex with you." Kyle said with a smile, which made the audience clapped their hands and laughed. Tessa and Hope burst into laughter, with tears and snot rushing on their cheeks, laughter But they couldn't stop at all. Maybe it was because the burden really made them laugh, maybe it was because of the luck and joy of escaping from death, but it didn't matter which reason it was. The important thing was that at this moment, they were happy. of.
So does Adam, because he has a date tonight with Katherine.
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