449 a punch
Looking at himself in the mirror, Adam felt very strange, as if he was seeing a face for the first time since he was born, which made him a little dazed. From this moment on, cancer was no longer a secret, it had become a part of his body. Part of it - to be more precise, it was hidden inside the body before, but now it appears in the head.
He is different after all.
The bald head made him stunned for a moment, and his eyes were slightly moist, but he did not pause for too long, took a deep breath, nodded slightly, and encouraged himself, but he still had no confidence, so he couldn't help but ask, "Look. Looks good, right?？”
However, he did not wait for Kyle's answer. Kyle was happily immersed in his own thoughts, looking at Adam's bald head intently, and then couldn't help but stretched out his hand to touch it, and his smile bloomed widely, feeling That furry touch was really wonderful. I looked at the mirror, then at Adam, and chuckled with pleasure..
“Not bad." Adam didn't notice Kyle's expression or even Kyle's movements. He was completely caught up in the wavering emotions. He had to take two big breaths to try to calm the turbulence in his chest. The anxiety settled down, and I kept nodding, affirming, and being firm.——
Adam also touched his head and removed all the broken hair on it. The short and hard touch was really strange. He looked at himself in the mirror again, trying to find the familiar self from the outline of his face, but This is really difficult.
Kyle was constipated again. The corners of his mouth twitched and his smile gradually disappeared. He shook his head slightly and said in a deep voice, "No, this is too weird.".”
With just one sentence, all the confidence Adam had just built collapsed, "We shouldn't do this." His eyes widened, and his watery eyes were filled with doubts and hesitation. He looked carefully and couldn't help but look at it again. He raised his hand and touched his head, rubbing it back and forth, one circle after another. It looked like he was touching a ball..
“Yes, it's a big mistake." Kyle's eyes were already straight. Looking at the head that was left with a green patch, like stubble, he felt that his thoughts had flown to the sky..
“Why don't we go to the barber shop? "Adam turned his head and asked uncertainly..
In the mirror, Adam's movements affected the reflection, and even Kyle came back to his senses. He twitched the corners of his mouth and said, "That's a good idea. Find someone to help you take care of it." But then, watching Adam turn around again, Kyle's eyes fell on the bald head again, and his voice gradually became quieter..
Adam pursed his lips and looked at the bald head carefully, a hint of disappointment surging in his eyes..
He knew he had cancer because the doctor announced the result, because he was undergoing chemotherapy, because he was undergoing psychological treatment, because he vomited, because he started losing his hair, and because everyone around him looked at the dead. Watch him as his mother handles him carefully as if he were a fragile glass doll……
But, at this moment, that sense of reality came over him heavily, as if two lead weights were thrown into his stomach. His whole body was floating under the cold bottom of the lake, and his sinking was accelerated because of this weight. Speed, but the dreamlike illusion has faded a bit, and the real and cruel reality has become slightly more obvious. The skin can feel the cold moisture beginning to invade..
Ever since the doctor pronounced his illness, everything seemed false, as if it had never really happened at all, as if it was just a fictional story played out on the TV screen. Then, the sense of reality slowly seeped out bit by bit, and first The first time was the vomiting after chemotherapy, the second time was the hair falling out while washing in the morning, and the third time is now..
That sense of reality was like a heavy punch, hitting the stomach again and again. The slowly spreading pain gradually spread like a spider web. The whole body had begun to curl up and convulse in pain, but still had to stand upright. Stand tall and straight, hiding the turmoil deep in your soul.
Each time, the illusory fog of dreams recedes a little, and the desolate scene of reality becomes clearer..
Looking at that bald head, he felt dazed for a moment deep in his eyes. The bitter taste danced gently on the tip of his tongue. Inexplicably, a watery light appeared in his eyes. The fragility and panic in that moment hit him hard..
The unfamiliar self in the mirror seemed to be the same, but it seemed completely different; there seemed to be something missing, and there seemed to be something more. It was a little distorted, a little deformed, a little strange, which made him panic and quickly lowered his eyes. Covering up all the emotions, when he raised his eyes again, the chaos had returned to calm, and all the watery light had converged into the depths of his eyes..
Will Risel, who was watching from the side, easily captured the loss in Renly's eyes. The slowly sinking sense of reality suddenly accelerated at every turning point, and accelerated again, becoming heavier and more fierce each time. , getting deeper every time, the suffocation and dull feeling of drowning, but unable to vent it. No one understands it except myself, and no one can help..
With just one look, Will was hit hard. Before he was caught off guard, tears fell down. He didn't even have time to be moved or suffer. He only realized his embarrassment when his cheeks were burned. But Will didn't want to turn around. , didn't dare to turn around, just stared at Renly blankly.
The moment of confusion passed by in a flash, but it was as heavy as a thousand blows! So painful.
Lifting his gaze again, Adam looked at the bald head seriously again, with a look of disgust in his eyes, "I thought that after shaving, it would be shiny and not leave any traces." There was nothing unusual about the voice, but those crystal clear eyes had gone through many changes..
Kyle didn't notice, couldn't notice.
A bystander is still a bystander after all, and the so-called empathy is just his own wishful thinking. Adam knows this, this is his path, and he must go on it by himself after all. Kyle’s company and his family’s company are his motivation, but every step he still has to take by himself.
Kyle only noticed Adam's disgust, frowned slightly, and said doubtfully, "You mean, like Vin Diesel?" Seeing Adam nodded, Kyle shook his head repeatedly, "No. ." Then he thought for a moment, showed a disgusted expression, and said loudly and firmly again, "No! That doesn't suit you, you look like Charles Xavier. And you're in a wheelchair too.”
Charles Xavier, Professor X in "X-Men".
Adam rolled his eyes, "Ha! Ha! That's funny." The dry smile was really full of sarcasm, and the tone of every word revealed a sense of contempt, "You should be lucky that I don't kill with my mind now." You." He also joked, "What on earth was I thinking? Instead of going to the barber shop, I used your shaver.！”
Hearing this, Kyle picked up the electric clipper, looked at it, and showed a proud smile, "I have never washed it. Moreover, it is not used for scraping the balls, but for cleaning/ chrysanthemum/flower.”
Adam pursed his lips slightly, looked at Kyle with a speechless expression, and then complained, "Are you referring to the last game night with Jonathan?？”
It's game night, but I have to clean the /chrysanthemums/flowers. This……
“Pfft." Jonathan Levine, who was standing behind the monitor, couldn't hold it back and spit out his saliva. Fortunately, he was not standing next to the microphone, which avoided the appearance of noise, otherwise it would have been terrible..
Unexpectedly, completely out of the blue, Renly actually made fun of Jonathan - the following lines of dialogue were not in the script, and were completely the free play of Seth and Renly. But... it was really funny. Great. Even though he was embarrassed, Jonathan had to admire Renly's fantastic idea! But, what’s going on with those slightly hot cheeks?？
The other staff members standing nearby were already in a state of panic and had no idea how to react. The amount of information was a bit overwhelming. However, their violently shaking pupils revealed their turbulent emotions at the moment..
Kyle was caught off guard by this sudden counterattack. He shook his head slightly, laughed dumbly, and said in a breathy voice, "I was joking..”
Adam suppressed the smile on his lips and shook his head firmly, "I'm not joking..”
Kyle was defeated. Looking at Adam's extremely serious and focused expression, Kyle opened his mouth slightly and froze on the spot. For a moment, he didn't know how to respond..
“Card! "Jonathan's voice rang, and Seth became depressed and complained loudly, "Hey, hey, I haven't responded yet, how can I get stuck here?？”
Jonathan couldn't help laughing, but he still had to restrain his smile and said seriously, "I don't mind anymore, what do you mind?".”
After saying this, the staff on the scene finally came to their senses and let out low laughter. Looking back carefully, they seemed unable to remember what happened, but they just felt that the filming of this scene was smooth and smooth. It's full of humor and has a lot to see, as if everything is really happening before your eyes.——
This is also true.
Everyone's eyes fell on Renly's body. To be precise, it was on his head. That bald head looked too conspicuous. Although it didn't shine as brightly as Vin Diesel, it was really It's too difficult to ignore even if you look at it.
Although Jonathan interrupted the filming, Renly still stood in front of the mirror, looking at the strange self inside. This reminded him of the years after his rebirth, looking at his own reflection in the mirror, that little baby body , those unfamiliar hair and eyes, that unfamiliar foreign language, everything is brand new, but it is also impactful..
Now, he felt as if he was reborn again, which made Renly feel a little dazed..
In a sense, cancer is also the beginning of a new life. Either die and be done with it; or live and change everything. This is a change that has no way out, and it is a change that cannot be refused..
Loss, that kind of faint loss is stirring in the chest, and there is no place to land..
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