429 Lack of enthusiasm
T? 0??,?E?P ?A?? J ????o??t?#???QP1: i ???O ?l??Trying to calm down, but the body is Constantly protesting, the throbbing in the head, the ringing in the ears, the soreness in the muscles, the coldness in the stomach... that heavy and sour feeling is everywhere; lying on the sofa, it feels like the cushion is turning into a pool The cold mire swallowed up his body bit by bit. The coldness and wetness penetrated into the blood along the pores and stabbed sharply at the bones, but he couldn't even muster the strength to resist.\r
He knew he was losing control, but he was unable to stop it. After barely suppressing it, the nameless fire swept over again, burning all his reason.\r
“If it's about the Oscars, then I can tell you that I'm not going to attend."\r
Before he could react rationally, he spoke impulsively. Even Renly himself didn't understand how this sentence came out, and why he suddenly mentioned Oscar? And why did you suddenly stop attending? \r
“What? " Andy was a little confused. This sudden situation really caught him off guard. Even though he had experienced many battles, he still blurted out a voice of surprise. But the loss of state only lasted for a moment. Andy took a deep breath and calmed himself down again. Then he spoke again and asked calmly, "Renly, what happened? Why did you suddenly decide not to attend? ”\r
“Chi." A sarcastic sneer escaped from the corner of Renly's mouth. He slowly opened his eyes and glanced at Andy. A faint sneer and contempt flashed in his eyes. "I thought you were doing this because of my health. I came all the way to Seattle. Why, now that I heard that I won’t be attending the Oscars, I suddenly became panicked? ”\r
Facing Renly's full-on sharpness, Andy's mouth still had a slight arc, but the smile disappeared from his eyes, "Renly, I think you need to rest for a while until you calm down. , let’s talk slowly.”\r
Andy realized that Renly was now in a state of crisis, just like a volcano erupting. Whoever hits him would be unlucky. He didn't understand what was going on. After knowing Renly for so long, he had never seen Renly before. Such a rude appearance.\r
Compared to the rebellious anger, Renly's calm and wise temperament has disappeared now. He seems to have become more approachable, but he also seems to have become more ordinary and simple. This is the strangest part.\r
“Now are you willing to let me rest again? "Renly sat up instead and stared at Andy. His dark brown eyes were not covered. All his emotions were clear at a glance, but it was just a mess, like a ball of wool with no threads visible. "What do I hope for? Do I rest, or do I wish I were at the Oscars? ”\r
Andy refuses to respond directly to Renly's aggressiveness. It's not that he can't refute, but that he understands that any refutation will only intensify the situation. Renly wants to quarrel after making it clear. He is actively provoking a war. Such Renly , it’s really hard to understand.\r
“I don't see the point of attending the Oscars." Andy didn't respond, but Renly had no intention of letting it go. The anger flowing in his chest kept pouring out, like a ball of flame, engulfing all reason and all control. , all the depression was burned away. "I am like a monkey in the circus, displayed in front of everyone, and then everyone comes to watch, have fun, and tease me! ”\r
“We all know that the Best Actor goes to Colin Firth, and the Best Actress goes to Natalie Portman. This is already a certainty, and all the other nominees are just running around. We arrived On the spot, and then said blessing words against his will. Jesus-hell-Christ, I don’t want to bless them at all, okay? Every nominee wants to win an award. Those who say they don’t want to win an award are just hypocritical nonsense! ”\r
An abnormal flush appeared on Renly's face, and his whole face suddenly turned rosy. The fresh and tender color highlighted the paleness of his lips and the dejection of his eyes.\r
Andy didn't want to respond, but he couldn't hold it back after all. "If you still want to win the award in the future, then you must attend!" He also noticed the abnormality in Renly's face. It looked so abnormal that he couldn't help but She gave Nathan a wink and signaled him to call the doctor, but Nathan was stunned and didn't respond for a while, and Andy's calmness couldn't help but be disturbed.\r
“No, I don't want it." Renly waved his hand nonchalantly, shook his head, and leaned back heavily, sinking into the cushions of the sofa, "I don't see the point of it."\r
“The meaning of it is that you can get your own recognition, and then build your career as an actor according to your own ideas." Andy barely suppressed his anxiety and persuaded the camp step by step, "In this world, there are so many people. Countless rules. We cannot be bound by the rules. Only by breaking the rules can we have freedom. But before breaking through, we must first adapt to the rules, learn to use the rules, and then break them. Those rebels who ignore the rules often They are all martyrs."\r
“Those ordinary people who are doing nothing in society, those who have lost their edges and individuality, those ordinary people who have accomplished nothing and succumbed to life. They all told themselves this." Renly could be said to be full of fire, ridiculing and scorning , ridicule, teasing, contempt, all eighteen martial arts are used in battle.\r
Then, Renly paused for a moment, looked at Andy seriously, and emphasized again, "No, I will not attend." \r
Originally, this was just a thought, a thought that came out of nowhere, but now this thought is growing bit by bit, and then uncontrollably occupies the entire head: He does not want to attend the Oscars.\r
In the face of cancer, he couldn't see the meaning of Oscar. Compared with life and death, compared with the meaning of life, a statuette is just a drop in the ocean. He should pursue a greater ideal and truly find the ideal that belongs to him on the road of life. own meaning, put aside the luxury and desire of Vanity Fair.\r
In front of the performance, he couldn't see the meaning of the Oscars. It was just an award voted for by a specific race, gender, and group of people. It was just like a presidential election. It was a game, a game controlled by a few people. For example, the Weinstein brothers.\r
He is an actor, not a star. He doesn't want to give up his persistence for a show.\r
“I'm filming, and the crew can't stop just because I'm alone." Renly's thoughts suddenly began to become clearer. In the chaos, the only belief guided him to sprint forward unswervingly.\ r
“We are in a very good situation now. Once interrupted, no one knows what will happen. Next, I have to shoot the scene where I shave my head. The whole crew is looking forward to it, and we are all doing it well. So I'm not going to the Oscars, I'm not going to Los Angeles for a circus show."\r
Renly's words were so firm, with a rough and cruel sharpness, and he rushed over unstoppably. This made Andy freeze on the spot. He could have opened his mouth to refute, but when he saw Renly's eyes His expression was bright, but his words were stuck in his throat.\r
This is the first time Andy has seen Renly's soul so clearly.\r
Hot and crazy, pure and sincere, bright and clear, the madness that is desperate for the performance, the concentration that is immersed in the performance and the determination that shines brightly because of the performance, are presented without any cover. It makes people unable to take their eyes away and makes the language lose its color.\r
But such light only burst out for a moment, and then Renly covered his mouth, ran to the bathroom in panic, threw the door panel fiercely, and slammed it shut, and the entire door panel was groaning in pain.\r
Andy didn't know why and looked at Nathan anxiously, but Nathan also looked confused - before today, Renly had never had such symptoms, and only Will and Seth knew about the afternoon episode.\r
The two people ran towards the bathroom in a panic. Before they could knock on the door, there was a violent sound of vomiting. Even through the door panel, they could clearly feel the exhaustion and the tearing pain. The weak voice burst to the extreme, hot, but cold.\r
It turns out that pain is so real and concrete.\r
Even Andy couldn't bear it. He averted his eyes in embarrassment and couldn't bear to continue listening, let alone Nathan. Andy knew that Renly's situation was very bad, visible to the naked eye, but the real situation was still far away. Far beyond imagination, a thin door panel seems to separate two worlds, and at the end of that side is hell.\r
Quickly turning around and leaving, Andy took out his mobile phone and immediately dialed the phone number. Through a series of connections, he contacted a local private doctor in Seattle and asked him to come to his door immediately.\r
After finishing all this, Andy returned to the bathroom door again, but it was quiet inside, with no sound at all. He raised his head and looked at Nathan, but only saw an anxious face and two blank eyes - he He was so anxious that he actually forgot that Nathan was locked out of the door like him, so naturally he had no way of knowing what was going on inside.\r
Taking a deep breath, Andy forced himself to calm down.\r
Renly's behavior today is too abnormal. To be more precise, Renly's behavior in the past two weeks has not been normal. Because of his busy schedule, Andy only contacted Nathan every day and did not notice Renly's behavior every day. situation, so the contrast today is particularly obvious, as if there has been a sharp turn of 180 degrees.\r
Andy had a bad feeling in his heart.\r
The bathroom door was opened, and then Andy saw Renly in front of him. It could be seen from his wet short hair that he had just cleaned and tidied up briefly inside, so he didn't feel the embarrassment of vomiting, but The blood on the pale cheeks has completely faded again, and the weakness and fatigue between the brows hint that things are not that simple.\r
Andy suddenly regretted it. If he had not introduced the work "I Fight Cancer" to Renly, then Renly would not be in such a predicament.？
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