1400 Trapped in a cocoon
Simmons looked down at his hands, and couldn't help but start to twist his fingers gently, as if he could feel the sticky and greasy blood on his fingertips, and the warm fishy smell lingered under his nose, so It is real and so certain. You can feel the viscosity of blood when you kill life, but you can't see any trace when you kill soul. It seems like this now; but he knows that this is an illusion, everything is an illusion, between his fingers and his palms Nothing at all, no blood, no soul.
That feeling is really amazing.
He seemed to be able to feel a pulling and driving force, slowly guiding his emotions and actions bit by bit, as if slowly awakening the devil hidden deep in his heart, that cruel and vicious aura. As he was slowly waking up, a soul appeared that even he himself was not aware of. He rushed towards his food with bared teeth and began to eat it with big mouthfuls..
The most terrifying thing is that he enjoys it.
He could even picture himself in his mind. The devil's black wings slowly spread out, blocking all light, and the sharp fangs were flowing with fresh blood. It was so sweet and delicious that he couldn't help but... He stuck out his tongue and licked it, and his smile bloomed..
He knows what he is doing, he is trampling on a stubborn dignity, he is destroying a young dream, he is destroying a thin hope, and more importantly, he is tearing apart a young soul, so cruel and cold It was so rough, but he enjoyed it and even felt a little pleasure.
Because if you want to become a truly strong person, you must go through many hardships.
He never worried that his actions might destroy a potential "Charlie Parker", because "Charlie Parker" would not sink. "Charlie Parker" would fight back, grow, improve, and transform. In the world of blood and fire, Achieve greatness in the process; someone who can be destroyed and defeated is not "Charlie Parker".
Simmons realized that this was incorrect, that this was not his idea, that this was not his three views, that these were all Fletcher's ideas, but the most amazing thing was precisely here. He enjoyed it immensely, and he and The ideological boundaries between Fletchers are disappearing. As if the performance just now awakened the demon hidden deep in the soul, the part that belongs to Fletcher is gradually raising its head, squeezing the space that belongs to Simmons..
In a trance, drama and reality are merged and intertwined..
Fearful yet excited, worried yet excited, confused yet excited, nervous yet expectant.
Simmons himself couldn't describe the feeling accurately. He lowered his head again, and the blood remaining on his fingertips seemed to become real and concrete again, as if he had just strangled Andrew with his own hands. This feeling is really...indescribable..
Andrew？
Simmons raised his head suddenly, followed his inner guidance, and looked at Renly who was sitting on the chair..
Renly was still sitting quietly, not moving, with his head bowed deeply. His hands on his knees were rubbing the nails of his thumbs with his index fingers, as if he was looking for the thorns around his fingers, which he could not get into. , faintly revealing a hint of anxiety and boredom.
That's Andrew, not Renly.
A scarred, lonely and helpless soul, after being baptized by the storm, is trying to cheer himself up again and find a way forward, but he is at a loss, and his pupils are shaking quickly and quietly at a loss. He looked around at the scene around him, just like a fox running on the ice, tiptoeing forward, ears erect, and the slightest disturbance would make it run away quickly, and then it would never be found again..
With a slight glance from the corner of his eyes, he caught the surprised, ridiculed, mocking, stunned, and puzzled looks of the band members. Like a sudden storm, they slowly and slowly woke him up, feeling the humiliation and self-esteem. The trampling of pride caused a sense of shame to sweep over him, far beyond pain and bitterness, far beyond sadness and helplessness, and stung his soul severely..
In an instant, he stood up suddenly and quickly left the range of the drum set. Like a bereaved dog, he left the practice room in a hurry and walked away. Every second he stayed here was a kind of torture, comparable to Ling Chi. Execution. He just wanted to leave, he just wanted to run away, like a coward, but so what? At least he doesn't need to suffer like a frying pan anymore.
“……”Simmons tried to call him to stop him from leaving, but the words were stuck in his throat, Renly? Or Andrew? He didn't know which name he should call. Before he could make a decision, the figure had already disappeared behind the swaying door panel, and his escape was getting faster and faster..
What's more, he didn't know what to say, "I'm sorry"? Does an apology really work?？
Inexplicably, Simmons could feel a sadness that he couldn't bear; but at the same time, Fletcher's voice was whispering: This is the test he needs to withstand, this is the only way he can succeed. The road is either to persist or to give up. The choice is simple and no one can force him..
That devilish whisper left no one with any resistance, and he actually... faintly expressed his agreement.！
So, what should he do now?？
Turning his head, Simmons looked at Damien and tried to ask for help, but he was disappointed. Damien failed to notice these slight abnormalities and was discussing the filming of the next scene with the staff. That beaming expression revealed his excitement and joy.
Directors and actors are different after all.
Inexplicably, Simmons felt a little disappointed. He looked at the direction Renly left and stood there, at a loss..
……
Renly left the rehearsal room quickly, his head still hanging deeply and unable to lift it up. He just wanted to hide in a corner where no one could find him, lick his wounds silently, and swallow all the humiliation and embarrassment. Go down, it seems that as long as you are isolated from the world, everything that just happened will become easier..
Actually, this is not too deep into the drama..
When Damien interrupted the filming rhythm, Renly had already come to his senses. The boundary between drama and reality was becoming clear again, but Renly did not get out of the performance state immediately, but remained immersed in it. In this emotional constraint and dilemma, he did it on purpose.
After EGOT, on the surface, Renly seemed calm and unconcerned, but he knew clearly that the emotions of complacency and pride were spreading uncontrollably. When he dreamed back at midnight, Renly also had Confused: What else can he do now? Or in other words, what should he do?？
“The New York Times’ exclusive interview with Bradley Adams is of great practical significance.
Even though Renly is a human being in two lifetimes, in the final analysis, he is still an ordinary person. He is experiencing stories that most people will never experience in their entire lives. He stands at the crossroads of history, at the top of the pyramid, and at the top of the pyramid. In the hurricane of spotlights and spotlights, intoxication and secret rooms are inevitable. Even if he tries hard to stay awake, he still has little success..
Just like a marathon.
When I started running, I was full of willpower, enthusiasm and passion, but as I ran, I gradually forgot the starting point and the end point, and forgot about myself and others. It seemed that everything became meaningless, just mechanically. Keep running, so I simply put everything behind me and just keep running, sprinting, sprinting, sprinting again..
But suddenly at a certain moment, he crossed the finish line. He was the first.
The joy and happiness of the championship instantly filled his chest, but what happened after that? Looking back, he couldn't see the other contestants or the target ahead. He was already at the top, so what should he do next? There is no guidance or direction. The emptiness and loneliness, the confusion and helplessness are more turbulent and cruel than the loneliness caused by being in the cold at high places..
Renly forced himself to calm down and devoted himself wholeheartedly to the rehearsal of "Breaking Drummer". He returned to his identity as an actor wholeheartedly and once again found the passion for performing, not for awards or box office, but for his own expectations and persistence, and continued Keep performing.
this is called a dream.
Act truly for yourself.
At such a moment and in such a situation, Renly was extremely lucky that he encountered the work "Breaking Drummer". Because Andrew Neyman's state of mind is exactly the best choice to reawaken his original intention and reawaken his dream..
Therefore, even though he could clearly distinguish reality from fiction, Renly forced himself to immerse himself in the emotions of the performance and the world of the characters, in this way forgetting the aura of EGOT and starting from scratch..
Invisibly, this fits perfectly with Andrew.
Chu Jiashu once had low self-esteem. He didn't think he could realize his dream, or in other words, he had no way to realize his dream and could only describe the shape of daydreams in his mind. Even if he was reborn as Renli, He still had hesitation and hesitation, because of his own uncertainty and the judgments of George and Elizabeth, all of which made him waver..
But he still chose to stick to his dream.
Not because of faith, not because of confidence, but because of faith. Having faced death once, he knew that he should not shrink back because of timidity. Only by taking steps actively and bravely could he not live in vain again, so he began to take action. run wildly.
The success of EGOT made him confident and even complacent. He almost thought he owned the whole world, and gradually began to get carried away. Then, he hit a wall hard, just like Andrew met Frank. Like Letcher, Renly also allowed himself to "encounter" Fletcher..
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