130 Sisyphus
Walking from the center of the seats to the aisle in the middle, everyone stood up, applauded, smiled, or patted their shoulders in a friendly manner to express congratulations. The short aisle seemed to have no end, and the surging crowd filled the sight. In every corner, the bright light blurs the vision, and all the scenes turn into spots of light, which are dazzling, but lose focus, leaving only a surging heat wave, and the continuous mist.
The steps under my feet seemed to be stepping on cotton, and my mind went blank. I just relied on my ability to walk towards the spotlight in front of me. This road is so long, and it has been planned since the previous life. A tidy beginning of childhood, through the teenage years without laughter, play and leisure, through the bleak and boring life in the hospital bed where you can't move, through the claustrophobic and dark passage after death, through the strict and rigid framework of this life. childhood, through the years of uninhibited and free-flying youth, through the crossroads of rebellion against parents and their disintegration……
He finally came here.
“You can only rely on yourself, no one can help you, dreams and freedom are the most useless things.”
“You are not a genius, that is just an illusion. You are just one of thousands of ordinary people who do nothing. Stop daydreaming, it will only make your life more miserable..”
“You have fifteen minutes to rest. Don't play with those children. They are not good for your future. If you want, you can sit down and read a book to relax your brain..”
“It's embarrassing, being an actor is not a dream, it's not even a career, it's a shame to the family..”
“…… Not like this! "It's useless..." "Reality does not allow dreams to exist" "Freedom and dreams are excuses used by poor people to comfort themselves"... "No!" "No!" ""reject! ""impossible！”……
The cold and cruel words were like sharp knives, piercing his body hard, leaving bruises all over his body..
His two lives were as long as a nightmare from which he could never wake up, but as short as a drop in the ocean. One step at a time, he was like Sisyphus in Greek mythology, pushing a heavy boulder and carrying one denial after another. , tireless, reckless and persistent, stupid and bloody, repeating and repeating, just looking forward to one day being able to push the boulder to the top of the mountain. Along the way, I walked hobbled and cried blood on the tip of my knife..
Not to prove myself, just to prove that life is not only cruel reality, but also silly dreams; to prove that besides "living", life can have other meanings.
He knew that the Emmy Award was just the first step, an insignificant first step, but he finally took the first step, didn't he? I've been waiting for two lifetimes, it's been a really long time..
“Congratulations! "Tina Fey stepped forward, gave Renly a polite hug, took a half step back, showed a bright smile, and said sincerely again, "Congratulations.！”
Renly took the trophy with both hands and looked at it carefully. The slender woman hugged an atom, and the muse spread her wings and soared freely in the flowing light. The message from her parents a year ago echoed in her mind. The ultimatum, "stupid persistence", emotions surged up in an instant. Unprepared, the bright golden trophy blurred the vision, casting a golden halo over the whole world..
He raised his head, and in the hazy halo before his eyes, the applause gradually subsided, but the dazzling stars were shining brightly. He opened his mouth, but his voice was stuck in his throat, and he only choked out a vague syllable. , the emotions were really too turbulent, and he hit him unreasonably. Even Renly himself was a little at a loss. The self-cultivation he had learned over the past twenty years had been retreating steadily at this moment, and his reason had completely surrendered..
It's all too strange.
He thought he would be rational and calm, he thought he would show gentlemanly demeanor calmly, he thought he would control the audience with humor, he thought he would accept the award lightly and confidently, as if everything was expected.中.He thought that he didn't care.
But imagination is always just imagination. When something really happens, when you are involved in it, all your expectations are shattered in an instant, just like a tornado coming, rampaging unreasonably, all common sense, all laws, all The rules no longer apply.
He retracted his right hand, and the cold metal texture seemed to have been warmed by the heat in his palm. The powerful heart beat hit his chest hard, as if it would burst into flowers at any time. The erratic feeling of being light and far away from the ground made people feel at a loss what to do.
Taking a deep breath, "...This is really a surprise, and even more of an accident. I think I need time to calm down, otherwise the snot will come out." Renly teased pretending to be relaxed, but his thick nasal voice gave him away. With the suppressed tears at this moment, he couldn't help but chuckle. This was really embarrassing, and there was also a burst of chuckles from the audience..
“Al, I'm sorry, I'm the one standing here." Renly looked at Al Pacino in the first row in front of him and nodded. Al was amused by this sentence, shook his head, raised his hand and said Giving Renly a middle finger, the guests nearby burst into laughter when they saw this scene, "Huh, I'm not sure what to say at this time, because my mind is completely blank, I even didn't even know the name of the episode. I can’t even remember. God, I still have a lot of people to thank. Now I finally know why everyone has to write their acceptance speeches in advance..”
There was a hint of sarcasm in the self-mockery, and many guests whistled in agreement. The atmosphere was much more lively than expected, "Well... I'm not a genius." This was what was in Renly's mind at this time. The only voice came from George's cruel conclusion. He thought he didn't care, but deep down in his heart, it was like a nightmare that never disappeared until today. "But I have been working hard." Renly trembled slightly. The voice gradually stabilized, and the strong self-confidence returned to the chest. He couldn't help but tighten his right hand. The metal texture and heavy mass of the trophy slowly pulled the erratic figure down and stood on the ground again. superior.
A sense of down-to-earth reality makes people feel at ease.
“So, thank you Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg for giving me this opportunity to perform, thank Rami, James and other actors for giving me guidance, and of course, thank you for the Emmy Award for giving me "Definitely." Three simple words of thanks, but the weight was extraordinary. At this moment, Renly finally understood why people's acceptance speeches were always so long, and they always thanked a lot of names that they didn't even recognize, because in Behind the glamor of actors, there are a lot of behind-the-scenes heroes who have never been taken seriously..
The surging emotions made people full of emotions, "I still remember that when I was filming the first scene, I made a mistake because of a focus error and looked directly into the camera. It was really a shameful mistake for a rookie." Renly Luoluo self-destructed generously, leaving the guests at the scene stunned. The crew of "Pacific War" was already laughing. Everyone whistled and booed, which made Renly laugh out loud..
“You can imagine how hard the crew worked to ensure quality. So, there are really many people who must be thanked here, but I decided to express them one by one after I go back, because our crew is really too big, and I I'm not sure when I can finish reading it... I can already feel the sound of the on-site director heaving a sigh of relief." Renly's teasing successfully made the audience applaud again - inadvertently, Renly complained once. The long question in the award speech, the wit and humor are indeed admirable, "So... thank you, thank you for making Sisyphus understand that dreams can still come true after all.".”
After saying that, Renly took half a step back, nodded politely, and then turned around, looking for the exit in confusion. The master of ceremonies and Tina, who had been waiting behind, saw Renly looking so confused. , they both laughed, and the emcee walked out first, guiding Renly and Tina to leave the stage..
Backstage, all the noise, all the excitement, and all the lights seemed to dim. People smiled politely and congratulated Renly, but that was it. Tina patted Renly again. Looking over her shoulder, she said with a smile, "Well done, enjoy it tonight." Then, she turned and left..
The joy of winning the award, the excitement of proving myself, the madness of realizing the first step of my dream... finally slowly came down at this moment..
This is just a trophy for the best actor in the miniseries and TV movie department. The Emmy Award is just the beginning. "Pacific War" is just the beginning. No one will care except himself, because life will continue and work will continue. We have to continue, and our explorations have to continue. On the road to acting, countless awards are still waiting for us; more importantly, studying the road of acting has nothing to do with awards. It is a contest between oneself and oneself. Laxness will only stagnate in the exploration of art.
I lowered my head to look at the trophy in my hand again. The joy was still there, but the excitement began to return to calm. That excitement that was so exciting that I could not control myself gradually turned into the motivation to continue working hard, the spur to continuous exploration, and the experience of being a human being in two lives. , let him clearly understand that this award has strengthened his confidence and courage. No one can stop him, not even George and Elizabeth..
On the stage, the awards ceremony is still going on, and the major awards are finding their place one by one. However, the aftermath of the shocking upset has just begun to ferment..
Newcomers emerge every year, and this year is no exception. However, this year's upset is particularly eye-catching. It is not Bryan Cranston, who achieved three consecutive championships, or Jim Parsons, who won the Emperor's Award for the first time. , not even the "Modern Family" that came out of nowhere, but the little-known Renly Hall who defeated the popular Al Pacino.
Wait, who is that? Everyone had the same confusion on their faces, "What did I miss?"？”
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