1135 Unable to answer
Looking at Anne who was staring at him eagerly, Renly couldn't hold it back. He shook his head helplessly, and the corners of his mouth turned up..
Just when Renly was about to speak, Anne eagerly moved forward, staring intently into Renly's eyes with wide eyes, as if with such a movement, she could see the soul hidden deep in the skin. , "Renly, will you leave again when you come back this time? Will you leave again in the future?"？”
The watery eyes still have tears that have not faded away, shining with urgency. The anxiety about gains and losses makes people feel soft in their hearts. The words of denial are already rolling on the tip of the tongue, but they cannot be said at all..
Then, Renly saw the disappointment and sadness deep in Anne's eyes, like thin rain and mist, entwining on the color of her pupils. Xiao Nizi slowly fell down on the bed and let go of Renly. The smile on the corner of his mouth drooped along with the curvature of his shoulders, and the light of his whole person seemed to dim..
“I know. You will leave eventually, right? ” Anne murmured softly..
“Anne." Renly called softly, trying to comfort him, but he didn't know how to express it. Faced with separation and children, language always becomes so pale..
Anne murmured to herself, "I know, I know everything. You think I don't know anything, but in fact I know everything." Anne raised her head, her eyes were slightly red again, and they were blurred. A layer of water mist covered my eyes, and tears gathered on my eyelashes, filled with grievances..
“Dad and Karen are together. Every time he comes to the hospital, he hides next to her and chats with Karen. On the phone, he smiles extremely happily, but when he turns to face me, he becomes sad again. Don't like me, dad has never liked me. But why? Is it because I did something wrong? Is that why dad left?？”
“Dad left, Heather left, Alex left, and now mom isn't here either. Why? Why is this happening? Why does everyone have to leave? Why can't we be together forever? I want to grow up so I can be with the person I love and never be apart.”
“Now you have to leave too. Because you want to chase your dreams and become the best actor in the world. You can't stay here to accompany me anymore, right? You still have your own life. You can't stay in the hospital forever and accompany me to grow up, right? I know, I know everything.”
“Renly, why am I alone in the hospital? Why am I the only one left? Why doesn't anyone want to accompany me? Is my mother suffering because of me? If I die, will my mother be happier? So will I never be alone again? Why is everyone leaving? Why？”
He was crying heavily, asking questions one after another, but the tears were always rolling in his eyes, stubbornly staying there, never falling down, pouting his mouth, mumbling vaguely, and then his voice began to choke, and the pair of eyes started to choke. His smart eyes were full of confusion and puzzlement, and his delicate eyebrows were tightly knotted together and could not be relaxed..
Renly felt sad, but didn't know how to comfort him..
Raising his right hand, Renly gently smoothed the wrinkles between Anne's eyebrows and showed a shallow smile, "Annie, life is like a journey, very long, very long.”
Renly suddenly realized that Anne was a child, but not just a child. The separation of life and death was an integral part of her life, and she had witnessed it early in her childhood; if she continued to regard her as a Child, if you don’t tell anything and continue to embellish everything, then sooner or later she will expose these lies and lose hope in life..
So, Renly knew it was going to be difficult, but he decided to have a good talk with Anne..
“Everyone has his own journey, so for some distances, we will cross together and walk side by side, and then we will part ways again and continue our journey..
Some people start from the starting point and then leave in the middle; some people join in the middle and then disappear quickly; some people, after joining in the middle, will accompany us for a long, long time until someone reaches the end, and then Say goodbye forever.”
“Everyone must complete their own journey. Sometimes, they walk alone; journey, that is also the best memory.”
Renly's voice was slightly choked for a moment, but he calmed down and continued, "Just like Heather. Heather has ended her life journey, but these past years are the most precious memories, and they will last forever. Accompanying us, it's like Heather has never left.”
Renly raised his right hand and gently rubbed Anne's hair, "This is a lesson that everyone must learn and face. Whether we are walking alone or in a group, in the final analysis, we Everyone has their own journey to complete.”
Anne just stared at Renly blankly, the sadness in her eyes flowing out bit by bit, "But...but why can't I learn?" Then, the tears burst out, and she burst into tears again, " I don't want Dad to leave, I don't want Heather to leave, and I don't want you to leave. Why? Is that why I never learn?？”
Those cries made Renly's heart break. His emotions were almost overflowing. He could only carefully put Annie into his arms, hold her tightly, and pat her gently. She whispered from her back, "No, it's not like that. I can't learn it either. Until now, I still haven't learned it.".”
Parting is always so difficult. No one can escape the natural laws of birth, aging, illness and death, but time and time again, life after life, he still failed to learn it..
At the door of the ward, Anita was holding pills and a water glass in her hands. Her back was just pressed against the wall. She didn't push the door open, but just stood there quietly, feeling sad. She was used to it in a hospital. After death, my nerves gradually began to numb, and I seemed to no longer care, as if I had become accustomed to it, but in fact I was not calm, but I gradually forgot the feeling..
Embarrassingly, Anita raised the back of her hand and wiped the tears on her cheeks. Then Anita pushed the door open and walked in. She put the objects in her hands on the table, then lightly patted Renly's shoulder and shook her head. "Annie's mood swings are too great today. She can't continue crying, otherwise she will have physical problems..”
Renly exhaled a long breath, patted Anne's back gently again, and whispered in her ear, "This is a very, very difficult subject, and I haven't learned it until now. So, you I haven’t learned it yet, which is normal. Take your time, take your time. In this journey of life, I will always be with you, and I will learn with you..”
Anne's emotions gradually calmed down, and her crying slowly disappeared. Then she raised her red and swollen eyes and looked at Renly seriously, "Really?？”
“Really." Renly nodded with a smile and said firmly, "Not forever, but at least for now." Renly wiped away the tears on Anne's face with his fingers, "You know, I hope to be an excellent actor. , I still need to keep running. If you can always accompany me during this journey and find your dreams, then we can run towards our dreams together.！”
Anne bit her lower lip, hesitated for a moment, and said timidly, "Just like Heather?"？”
Renly's eyes flashed slightly, but his smile remained unchanged, "Yes, just like Heather. However, you can have your own dreams, just like Alex has always dreamed of becoming Superman, and you can also find your own future. goal to strive for.”
“I don’t want to be Superman, he’s not good-looking.” Annie wrinkled her nose and said in disgust..
Renly and Anita exchanged glances, and both laughed happily. Finally, Anita said, "Then we don't want Superman. Annie can think about it slowly. However, if you want to chase your dreams, the most important thing is to take care of yourself." Body, a strong heart and a strong soul, this is the most perfect dreamer.”
Anita picked up the transparent plastic cup and water cup containing the pills and handed them to Anita.
Anne looked at Renly, and after catching the affirmative light, she took the pills, raised her head and swallowed it, then drank all the water in the glass in one go, and smiled triumphantly at Renly. , waving the quilt in his hand as if to show off. After seeing the bright smiles in Renly and Anita's eyes, Anita became shy again and immediately got into Renly's arms..
Looking at the thin little Annie in his arms, Renly just felt heartbroken..
For adults, they never understand how many thrills and earth-shaking experiences children have experienced in their world, and their childhood memories have long since disappeared in the cruelty and indifference of growing up..
Renly once read a professional research report, which mentioned an illusion of time. For children, time passes very quickly, almost three times as fast as in the adult world. In other words, real time may have passed by minutes, but three minutes have passed in the child's world.
In the past year, it has been three years for Anne; and the absence of Joss and Renly has also been such a long and difficult time. Every minute and every second is not easy..
Therefore, during today's meeting, Anne collapsed twice, and her mood could not be stabilized at all..
“Annie, let's set up a secret communication line between us that belongs only to us, okay? If you miss me, just send me a text message or video. After I finish my work, I will reply to you as soon as possible. What do you think of this idea?？”
Renly had just finished speaking, and then he saw Anne's eyes suddenly brighten up, like little suns..
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