Chapter 1608
Even if I open my eyes, it’s the same. (3)
It wasn’t that he had particularly intended to follow him. He was just looking for a place to escape the overwhelming stares.
While thinking of somewhere less conspicuous than the obvious lodgings, this place suddenly came to mind.
This place where Chung Myung often climbed alone, his figure lingering in his thoughts.
Only after experiencing the same stares and walking the same path did Baek Cheon understand.
The certainty of being right and the belief that he was doing the right thing didn’t necessarily bring comfort.
Baek Cheon glanced sideways at Chung Myung. This guy must have endured such stares for several years now.
To be honest, Baek Cheon sometimes envied Chung Myung. His insight to see what others couldn’t, his courage to discuss what others wouldn’t dare to.
But now, he understood how much of a burden it was to bear all that weight alone.
Chung Myung asked.
“How’s Shaolin?”
“If you’re asking about the situation with the Blood Cult, fortunately, there was no major conflict. They withdrew without hesitation. The monks of Shaolin have decided to guard Mount Song.”
Chung Myung slowly nodded. Although he didn’t ask further, Baek Cheon added.
“I asked Monk Hye Bang for help in dealing with the remnants of Surochae. He agreed, so within a few days, the remaining ones will withdraw and move to Shaanxi.”
“Alright.”
Chung Myung nodded calmly once again. This time, Baek Cheon asked.
“What about Monk Hye Yeon?”
For a moment, Chung Myung’s gaze shifted slightly towards Hwasan, specifically to the pavilions that were now unoccupied.
“He’s been holed up in his room ever since we got back.”
Baek Cheon’s face clouded with concern.
“…I see. Then maybe I should go talk to him…”
“Leave him be.”
Chung Myung cut him off sharply. His voice was short but firm.
“Right now, it’s better to let him be alone. He wouldn’t hear anything anyway.”
A short sigh escaped Baek Cheon’s lips.
“…Alright.”
It was hard for Baek Cheon to even imagine what Hye Yeon must be feeling right now. If Baek Cheon had gone through the same hell, he wouldn’t be in his right mind either. So, all they could do now was wait for Hye Yeon to pick himself up.
Chung Myung, gazing into the distance, said.
“He’ll get back up. Because that’s the kind of a person he is.”
Baek Cheon silently watched Chung Myung. He acted indifferent, but it was clear he was quite concerned. Judging by his demeanor, it seemed he had already checked on the room where Hye Yeon was several times.
Baek Cheon exhaled a long breath through his nose and said.
“He will.”
Delicate yet strong. That’s who Hye Yeon is.
“What about the Abbot?”
Baek Cheon asked, and Chung Myung answered without taking his eyes off the sunset.
“Well, maybe… he’ll go back. To Shaolin.”
“To Shaolin?”
Chung Myung nodded faintly. Baek Cheon asked with a puzzled look.
“Well, can he? After burying so many people in the cold ground, with what face will he return? If it were me, I’d be too afraid to face those left in Shaolin to easily go back.”
“He’ll still return.”
Chung Myung murmured quietly.
“Because he has nowhere else to go.”
Somehow, there was a hint of bitterness. Baek Cheon couldn’t understand where this bitterness stemmed from.
“Then Shaolin will…”
“It won’t be able to step forward for a while.”
Even if Shaolin’s strength still remains on Mount Song, Beop Jong no longer has the power to move Shaolin. Those who stayed in Shaolin had rebelled against Beop Jong in the first place.
However, fortunately or unfortunately, those who remained on Mount Song also do not have the strength to drive Beop Jong out. Hye Bang has not yet established himself as someone who could replace Beop Jong.
In the end, an uncomfortable coexistence will continue for a while.
Until time dissolves the old grudges between them, and the scabs covering the wounds fall off naturally.
Baek Cheon let out a low sigh.
“What is the Abbot thinking?”
“Well… I don’t know.”
“If only he had just…”
Baek Cheon looked at the distant sky, sighed, and shook his head.
If only he had listened to others a little more… so many lives wouldn’t have been lost in vain.
But for some reason, he couldn’t say those words out loud. It felt like they were stuck in his throat.
Baek Cheon unconsciously touched his neck. It was a natural reaction to a small, nagging discomfort.
Seeing this, Chung Myung slightly leaned back, shifting his weight onto his arms and spoke.
“He must have believed.”
“…”
“That he wasn’t wrong. That he was on the right path, and no matter what others said, everyone would eventually understand that this was not the wrong way.”
At that moment, Baek Cheon understood what the discomfort he felt was.
“That is…”
Chung Myung nodded and asked.
“Right. Is that really wrong?”
An inexplicable chill ran down Baek Cheon’s fingers.
It was wrong. There was no other way to put it. The results had already proven it. Talking about his mistakes could take all day.
However, Baek Cheon couldn’t bring himself to confidently answer Chung Myung’s question.
He didn’t know.
Until the results are clear, no one can truly know if the path they’ve chosen is right or wrong.
It’s easy for those watching from a distance to make judgments, but it’s never that simple for the person directly involved.
So, in the end, one has no choice but to endure. To believe that the path they are walking is the right one, to hope that what they are doing is not wrong, and to move forward silently.
Just like…
“He must have realized it too, at some point.”
“…”
“But by then, it was already too late. He would have regretted it and regretted it again. Reliving countless times what he could no longer change, what was already over. Painfully and desperately.”
Even so, one cannot sympathize with Beop Jong. Chung Myung would feel the same way.
The reason why they cannot easily criticize someone who leaves no room for sympathy is something Baek Cheon now understands.
The world in which a single choice determines the lives of thousands, tens of thousands. The feelings of those who must walk silently along a cliff made of blades.
Can Baek Cheon say otherwise? Is he truly walking the right path now?
It’s not such a distant story. Just moments ago, he had dug into a matter that everyone else preferred to leave untouched.
What if it was just a simple worry? What if it only seemed that way because of coincidental circumstances?
If so, what Baek Cheon did was nothing more than destroying an unsteady alliance from the start. Setting off a chain of doubts that would eventually consume them all.
Was that really the right thing to do? Baek Cheon’s fingers trembled slightly.
‘Courage…’
He once believed that. That true courage was to firmly push forward what one believes to be right. That true courage was to uphold ‘what is right’ even at the cost of one’s life.
But who decides what is ‘right’?
Just like Baek Cheon earlier, Beop Jong must have believed it too. After much deliberation, he would have been certain there could be no mistake in his conclusion.
Despite countless concerns, he couldn’t abandon the ‘justice’ he had found.
When that justice dragged not only himself but everyone else into hell, what could Beop Jong have felt?
He should not be pitied. He does not deserve pity. And yet…
“Suddenly scared, are you?”
Chung Myung’s voice reached him. When Baek Cheon turned to look at him, Chung Myung had a faint smile on his face, with the shadow from the sunset cast over it.
It was different from the usual smiles he would give when seeing Baek Cheon struggle.
Baek Cheon responded quietly.
“Not scared, just… I’ve realized something. There is no such thing as a perfect choice. No matter how hard you try to hold on, eventually, there will be things you lose.”
Chung Myung looked at Baek Cheon silently. Baek Cheon continued speaking.
“There will be regrets too. Days will come when I’ll lament that I could have made a better choice. But… whatever the outcome, it’s better than not choosing at all.”
He didn’t give a reason.
But both Baek Cheon and Chung Myung knew.
In the end, someone has to make the choice and bear the responsibility for it. Postponing the decision only means pushing that responsibility onto someone else.
That’s why there’s no turning back once a step is taken.
Even if one day they become another Beop Jong, cursing themselves, it’s better than casting others into that suffering.
“That’s why I won’t back down.”
Chung Myung quietly looked at Baek Cheon. Now the sun had disappeared beyond the western mountains, leaving only the lingering light spreading around him.
Baek Cheon looked Chung Myung straight in the eyes and spoke.
“So, it’s not your fault.”
Chung Myung’s lips twitched slightly. But Baek Cheon was quicker.
“Maybe there was a way somewhere. A way you could have stopped the Abbot’s choice from the beginning.”
“…”
“You’re probably still searching for it. Because that’s the kind of person you are. You think if you had made the right choice, if you had found that path, they wouldn’t have died like that.”
Chung Myung’s face hardened.
“I…”
“Really, you’re such a ridiculous guy.”
“…What?”
Chung Myung looked a bit dazed at the sudden criticism. Baek Cheon twisted his lips as he looked at him.
“I can’t even begin to understand how highly you must think of yourself to believe something like that. Aren’t you a bit strange?”
Chung Myung’s mouth opened slightly.
“No…”
It wasn’t the statement itself that was shocking, but the fact that it came from Baek Cheon that left him speechless.
“Don’t underestimate people.”
“…”
“Even if the Abbot made the decision, it was everyone there who chose to follow it. And even if you made a mistake, it was us who chose to follow suit.”
Chung Myung stayed silent.
“So don’t go around thinking you’re shouldering everyone’s lives. It’s irritating.”
“Sasuk.”
Baek Cheon stood up abruptly.
“It’s not you who decides my way of life, it’s me.”
He then looked up at the sky. Night was pushing the sunset away. The sunset would eventually disappear, but it wouldn’t lose its color until the end.
“So stop moping around with that unfitting expression.”
“…”
“I won’t wait long.”
With those final words, Baek Cheon turned and began descending the mountain.
Chung Myung, staring blankly at his retreating figure, then looked up at the darkening sky.
Thud.
And then he lay down on the spot.
“They’ve grown up. Those little brats.”
He chuckled softly, having been momentarily lost in thought.
Did Chung Mun ever feel this way while watching him?
No, probably not. Chung Mun couldn’t have looked at him this way until the very end.
Chung Myung had led the way.
He believed he had to revive the fallen Hwasan with his own hands and had done his best to drag it forward.
But at some point, they started leading him instead. No, they were even pushing him, telling him not to hold them back.
“…Sahyeong.”
When he closed his eyes, the image of Chung Mun appeared. Not the gentle, smiling face, but the one with a hardened expression.
That face was surely…
– I will never be able to accept this decision until the moment I die.
Chung Myung’s eyelashes trembled.
It was what he had said to Chung Mun, who had blocked him from going to save Chung Jin.
Words he had repeated countless times, and regretted just as many. Yet, no matter what, he could never fully erase them from his heart.
Perhaps he was still a ghost of the past.
Trapped in the past, knowing he must move forward but too afraid of losing what he had, unable to take a step. Just a pathetic being who only knew how to cling desperately to what he held.
A bitter laugh escaped Chung Myung’s lips.
“Honestly… they won’t even let me rest for a moment.”
He stood up.
Knowing was enough.
It didn’t matter if he was a pathetic person who couldn’t free himself from the swamp of the past. Because here, there were those living a different life from that muck.
So dazzling, and thus so heart-wrenching.
The sky now was the same color as when he had faced Chung Mun in the past.
But now Chung Myung stood in the place where Chung Mun once stood. So now, he had to give a different answer.
The answer that Chung Myung of the past most wanted to hear.
With a faint smile, Chung Myung took a step down the mountain.
In the vision, Chung Mun, who had been frozen in place, finally gave Chung Myung a gentle smile.
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